


My Dream Girl

by MaJimFanFics



Category: Big Bang Theory RPF, The Big Bang Theory (TV)
Genre: F/M, Majim - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-11-01
Updated: 2015-11-01
Packaged: 2018-04-29 08:31:44
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 12
Words: 23,953
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5121725
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MaJimFanFics/pseuds/MaJimFanFics
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Jim, a poor and simple employee, struggles from getting hurt as he falls for the rich, hot and beautiful, Mayim, whom he can only have as his girlfriend in his dreams for he was too out of her league.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Mayim is my Dream Girl

Mayim was busy reviewing project reports left at her table when suddenly Jim entered the room, he was her dad’s secretary for quite some time already, four or five years? She can’t barely remember. He is unlikely to be seen at her office and she felt weird seeing him come.

“Yes?” She asked him making him explain his sudden presence.

His voice was so soft as if he is so shy to speak in front of her. “Uhm… Your dad, Mr. Bialik told me to be your secretary-”

“Oh! I get it. Where is Michael even?” She asked wondering where her real secretary was. Jim gulped. “He was fired I am now your secretary, miss Bialik.” He replied surprising her. She stared at him in surprise and dropped her jaw. She immediately stood up and went to her father’s office leaving Jim alone at her office.

“What the hell dad?!” She started complaining. “What?” Mr. Bialik replied as he moved his eye glasses a little below his sight, he knew this was gonna be his daughter’s reaction. “What what? Where is Michael? My secretary.” She asked him.

“Do you really expect me to make him stay after hearing that he is necking my daughter?” He replied. Mayim’s eyes grew upon hearing his dad’s discovery about her affair with her previous secretary. “Then get me a new one!” She replied.

“I already did.” He replied shortly. Mr. Bialik placed the paper he was reading on his table and laid his back on his chair as he looked at her daughter.

“Didn’t you see Jim? He’ll be your secretary from now on. He’s been working for me for years already. He’s trusted and great enough to be your long term secretary, unless you know… You were expecting me to hire a sex-itary for you.” His father explained to her leaving her with no choice. Mayim left his dad’s office in annoyance. She had no choice but to have the weird and awkward, Jim, as her new secretary.

She sat at her seat and frowned looking blankly at nothing. Jim secretly looked at her from his small desk inside her office.

-

Jim has been working at Bialik Group of Companies (BGC) for about five years already as Mr. Bialik’s male secretary. Despite that he was a timid and silent person, he served and earned Mr. Bialik’s trust during his stay.

He loves writing poems and letters, he is very much into literature. He also loves paper folding and origami type of arts. He didn’t have much friends for he was shy and silent, his colleagues didn’t exert much effort to befriend him as well for his existence in the office was quite irrelevant. Behind all these timid and shy personality, Jim, is also a hopeless romantic kind of man, he has been secretly adoring Mr. Bialik’s daughter, Mayim for years, he writes love poems and piece of literature for her secretly ever since he fell in love with her.

On another side, Mayim is the only daughter of Mr and Mrs. Bialik. She grew up competing for her parents’ time for her and their business which made her choose to be a rebellious kind of daughter. She seeks love from several people at a young age. She started dating and getting into a relationship at a young age until she was all grown, she was known to be every rich man’s girlfriend. Moreover, Mayim was well recognized for her great intelligence in handling and contributing to BGC’s development since she entered the company, she was very smart and wise. Her immense beauty and appeal helped her advance in most of the things she do but then, after all the contributions and development she have shown, his father didn’t like the way she was using her body and beauty to get through life and so he kept on making moves and ways to teach his beloved daughter her lesson and make her realize that she has to stop it.

On a more personal story, Mayim has been in an open relationship with the owner of one of their valued investors, Ryan, and their relationship has been recognized by every employee in their building for they are commonly seen being too physical with each other whenever they are seen together around.

She had Ryan as her boyfriend since they graduated high school, their parents liked them for each other and they weren’t seeing anyone that time and so they agreed to be together as their parents were pleased. Nevertheless, both of them are tremendously attractive that it has become inevitable for the both of them to secretly get into an affair with another party without letting each other know and whenever they discover about it, they just make up for it with a torrid make out session or angry sex.

-

Ever since Jim started working as Mayim’s secretary, he thought he could be closer to her personally but it turned out to be just like before, he was still this kind of guy who just secretly blushes and gets butterflies every time they see their dream girl around. In addition, it seems like it didn’t favor him because it just brought him to the place where he could always see how the girl of his dreams cuddles and get a bit physical with her boyfriend whom he could never compete with.

-

One afternoon, Jim started writing a poem about heartaches after he accidentally saw Mayim and Ryan necking before they entered the elevator. He opened his little notebook and wrote everything on his mind.

*clears throat*

Jim jolted upon hearing someone around. “Miss Mayim.” He uttered. She placed a folder in his table. “Instead of writing unnecessary things on your fancy notebook, why don’t you go down and get me ten photocopies of this?” She told him.

Jim gulped, he was so nervous that she almost saw him writing poems about her. “Alright, miss Mayim. I’ll do it right away.” He replied and bowed her head a bit. She was bothered with his intense shyness and timidness. “You really don’t look at the person your talking to, do you?” She told him. He still refused to look at her for he felt so ashamed. “Hey.” She said softly. He slowly moved his sight and looked at her. He doesn’t usually look at her when she’s looking back at him because he gets butterflies on his stomach.

“There. You look at the person when you’re talking to them.” She praised him and winked at him before walking out of her office.

Jim had an intense exhale as she left him. He was badly in love with her that he finds it hard to handle his feelings especially when she is that close to her. Her beauty was glorious to him that every time she looks back at him, he gets stars-trucked and his limbs just gets frozen.

The image of her green eyes and angelic face was imprinted in his mind so clearly that he felt so weak from all the feels he had as he looked at her. After a moment, he saw himself smiling. He grabbed the folder and went down to get ten photocopies of the documents for her.


	2. Throwing Plates

Mayim remained faithful to Ryan since she had Jim as her secretary, she had certain flings but then she decided to stick out with Ryan instead. Jim would always see them flirt out right next to him but he remained silent about his feelings for her, she loved her a lot but he knew he wasn’t enough so he just let things flow next to his eyes.

Mayim felt strange about Ryan lately. She felt like he’s cheating on her and she was right. She discretely followed him by chances to catch him on act. Little did it surprise her that she was right — he was cheating on her with his ex girlfriend, Kenya.

“How dare you!” She yelled as she ambushed him with slap upon seeing him make out with Kenya at his office. She followed it with a slap on Kenya’s face. He immediately protected Kenya from her. “I knew you were cheating on me!” Mayim yelled at them, he was guilty. “You’re such a slut! You were an ex for a reason but you can’t keep your horny self to yourself!” Mayim continued yelling and repeatedly slammed his face in anger. “Stop it!” Kenya stopped her. “Stop flirting with my boyfriend!” She countered, she won’t stop so Kenya slapped her — silencing everyone.

“Fuck you.” Mayim swore.   
“Yeah, fuck me. Did you know that you’re boyfriend fucked me too?” Kenya countered. Mayim’s eyes grew in her response. “He fucked me hard.” She added.   
“Let me tell you something, bitch. I fucked this guy you were kissing seconds ago first before you did!” She replied which provoked Kenya to slap her face. Ryan tried to stop them from fighting. “Let me go!” Mayim yelled as he separated them.

“You know what? I’m done! We’re done, Ryan! Fuck you and your sluts!” She yelled and broke up with him before walking out.

-

Mayim has been in a bad mood lately since their break up causing her excessive yelling to Jim. Ryan and Mayim’s break up has been around the company already causing her so much annoyance hearing the employees gossip about her.

Jim handed Mayim a document for review when she suddenly bursted out in fury causing her to say hurtful words to him out of nowhere.

“Seriously? Can’t you see what I’m going through right now and you’re giving me another bullshit to think about? Are you that inconsiderate? Don’t you understand? Oh! It’s Jim! You don’t have feelings! How can I forget. You know what? Fuck you all. You’re probably laughing behind my back lately because of my break up but who cares? I don’t care about you! Fuck you! You’re a useless piece of shit. You don’t even talk! You’re so shy. You’re so scared. Guess what? Who cares if you’re talking behind my back? At least someone cares about me? How about you? Nobody cares! So get the fuck out of my face now!” She said continuously startling and hurting him.

“Now!” She slammed her table — he panicked and immediately walked away. He was badly startled with the words he heard from her, he wasn’t used to such things and worst part is it came from Mayim, the girl he looks up and woes to.

Afternoon came, the employees started to go home. Jim went back to the office to get his things trying to act timidly to keep from getting Mayim’s attention. She looked at him as he entered the office and fix his things. He looked so nice and soft, she felt so guilty for saying the things she said to him. She sighed and stood up heading closer to his small desk.

“Hey.” She said in a soft voice. He was a bit stunned, he has always been like that when she talks to him.

“Uhm… Hello, miss Mayim. I’m about to go. Do you need anything else?” He replied politely.

“Oh. Uhm, nothing. I… Uhm… Just wanna… Apologize?“ She began, he didn’t see it coming.

“For yelling at you a while back. I was just carried away. I didn’t mean it. Really.” She continued. He always had a soft spot for her in his heart that he didn’t have a second thought in forgiving her. He smiled softly at her. “It’s alright, miss Mayim.” He replied. She was amazed with how easy he could forgive her and be able to give her a smile. “Really?” She had to confirm. He replied with a polite nod and continued fixing his things.

“Do you need anything else, miss Mayim?” He asked. “No…” She replied. He nodded and started to walk away. “Jim.” She stopped him. He turned around and looked at her. “Do you wanna hitch in?” She asked. “Hitch in?” He asked in confusion. “Yeah. Uhm. Ride my car. I’ll ask my driver to drop you by your house.” She clarified.

“Oh, that’s not necessary, ma'am. Thank you-”

“Come on.” She grabbed his hand and insisted. He could no longer say no.

As they rode her car, he started to doubt the reality. He couldn’t believe he was on solo with her and it is not in the office. They were so close to each other inside her car.

“Uhm. Thank you for this ride, miss Mayim.” He cuts the silence.

“Yeah.” She replied shortly. He wondered what was she thinking. “Are you alright, ma'am?” He asked. She wanted to hear that, she’s been yearning for someone to ask her that and she felt so glad he did. She looked at him and saw the sincerity of his concern.

“I’m sorry to ask, if you think I’m crossing a line, you don’t have to answer-”

“No. I needed that.” She cuts in.

“So…” He hanged.

“Have you ever felt like want to bomb the whole world, punch everyone, yell at people because you’re so angry at something… Or someone?” She began sharing. He couldn’t recall being in such scenarios but he recalled a place called “Plates” — a restaurant where you can buy porcelain as much plates as you want for only $1.00 each and throw it against the wall to release your anger and frustrations.

“I know a place that can make you feel better… It is called plates. It is beside-”

“Louie, you heard him. Bring us to Plates.” She cuts in and commands her driver. She had no idea what that place is but she believed him.

-

Jim guided her as they entered the place. She looked around feeling odd as she saw several people throwing plates at the frustration booths as if it was a thing. Jim came closer to her and handed her a pile of plates. “Give it a try.” He offered. She snorted. “This is embarrassing… And stupid.” She refused. He looked at the other girl beside them yelling as if it’s the end of the world while throwing the plates. Mayim looked at her as well and looked back at him.

“Fine… But this is really weird.” She said as she grabbed a plate and took a deep breath — closed her eyes and silently swore about Ryan. She threw the plate against the wall and the sound of shattering made her feel bizarrely better.

He looked at her with his eyes asking if that helped her. He extended his arms and offered her some more plates. “That actually helped.” She confessed and continued throwing plates and her swearing just got louder.

“Fuck you, Ryan!”  
“You’re such a fuck boy! Go to hell!  
“You are useless, why did I even trust you!”  
“You’re the worst!”  
“You should die in the carnal level of hell!”  
“I’m going to find-”

She stopped as she ran out of plates. “That’s all that we’ve got?” She asked Jim. “Uh…” He uttered. “Get some more!” She said eagerly.

“I’m going to find someone better than you!”  
“That would be so easy!”  
“To find a nice guy who’s not a fuck boy like you!”

She continued swearing and ended up being breathless with the extreme release of anger.

“I hope that helped…” Jim uttered as she breathes heavily. “It actually did.” She replied and smiled at him.

“This is a restaurant right?” She asked. “Yeah.” He answered. “Let’s eat here.” She suggested. He paused for a while, he thought that the restaurant isn’t classy like where Mayim usually eats at and he was afraid she’ll be disappointed with it. “Well, this is’t the restaurant you usually go to-”

“Let’s take our orders!” She squealed. They took their orders and luckily, she enjoyed the meals even if she wasn’t used to eating on some mid class types of restaurants. She vented out to Jim as they go through their meals, she never felt more comfortable and relieved in venting out about Ryan than him. He listened to her, he wasn’t biased — her friends would always say that she has to get back with Ryan for the sake of the company and they always see their arguments as shallow and easy to mend up.

“Thank you, Jim. Good night.” She said before he went down the car as they arrived at their place. “You’re welcome, miss Mayim. Good night as well.” He replied and left.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> spoilers for next chapter is a lot of Jim and Mayim’s bonding and hanging out! Hope you like this chapter! Keep supporting!


	3. Colliding Worlds

Mayim and Jim continued hanging out after work hours. Mayim enjoyed his company, it helped her ease her distress over Ryan’s cheating and the pressure from her father.

“Where are we going now?” Jim asked. “Somewhere I always go to when I’m mad.” Mayim replied. As they reached their destination, Mayim assisted him. “Firing range?” Jim gasped. “You got plates? I got bullets.” She winked at him as the people assisted her.

“Miss Mayim.” The guy handed her a revolver and a 9mm. “This one’s for you.” She handed him the 9mm. His eyes grew in overwhelm. “I don’t know how to use this.” He said shaking. She placed the eye protector on jim. “I’ll teach you.” She said before she covered his ears with the ear puffs.

They walked to the range area and set themselves up. She taught him the basics of handling. “This is a 9mm. It’s recoil is weaker than this (revolver).” She told him. “Alright…” He uttered still quite nervous in handling the gun. “One feet backward. Hold it straight. This is where you’ll look at, and then this and then the target.” She continued. “Now, this is the trigger lock, open it, move your hands to the trigger, don’t hold it when you’re not going to fire yet.” She informed him. “Alright.” He replied. She unlocked his trigger lock and took a step back. “Now try firing.” She told him. He gulped and aimed for the target and pulled the trigger, he took his first shot. “Great!” She cheered and assisted him in putting down the gun as she pointed to him where his shot went.

“Now try again. Finish your sixteen rounds.” She cheered for him and he took his rounds getting a bit shocked for every shot which he got used to after a couple more.

After finishing their firing session, they decided to go home.

“Thank you for the day, Ms. Bialik.” Jim thanked her before he was about to go down. She wanted to spend some more time with him and so she thought of an idea. “It’s a cold night. Won’t you invite me for some coffee?” She asked making him a bit stunned. “Uhm… Sure. Sure.” They went down the car and he escorted her inside his small house and immediately prepared a cup of coffee for her. “I’m sorry, I only got this kinds of coffee.” He apologized and showed her his instant coffee packs. “I’m sure you’re used to some imported coffees. This is all I’ve got.” He elaborated and handed her the cup of coffee. “It’s fine.” She replied and smiled.

He sat opposite her in the couch awkwardly clueless of how to start a nice conversation. “You seem tensed.” She noticed. “Oh. Uhm.” He uttered and giggled. “So you live here alone? What are you doing? Where’s your family?” She asked. “Yeah. I actually live in Texas but I stay here for work. I pay for my cousins’ basic needs.” He shared. “Oh… Where’s your parents? Your family?” She asked again. “Oh… I don’t actually have parents. My mother isn’t my real mother, she said my real parents left me in front of their gate when I was a baby… So… Yeah. I’m all alone.” He shared. She heard the insincere happiness in his voice, she knew he wasn’t very okay. “Oh. I’m sorry to ask.” She apologized. “It’s alright.” He replied. She took her last sip of coffee and bid her goodbye. “I should probably go. It’s getting late.” He escorted her outside up to her car.

“Thank you again for this day, Miss Mayim.” He thanked her. “Sure. Thank you too.” She replied and they exchanged smiles. “Good night.” She told him. He blushed a bit. “Uhm… Good night, miss Mayim.” He replied shyly struggling not to blush in front of her. “Yeah.” She uttered waiting for him to initiate some sweet good night kiss. An awkward silence swarmed them and their blushing cheeks are the only relevant that moment. He wanted to kiss her good night but he hesitated fearing she would find it disrespectful and gross.

“Ugh. You really won’t do it, do you?” She breaks in the silence making him speechless. “I said good night.” She repeated. “Uhm… Yeah. Goo- good night.” He stammered and didn’t kiss her. She rolled her eyes finding his awkwardness cute. “You’re such a dork.” She uttered and initiated a kiss on his cheek. “You kiss a girl after a date.” She informed him and went inside the car. He was left speechless as her car drove away. He touched his cheek and reminisced that short time that his dream girl’s lips patted on it, he couldn’t believe it happened, it was like a dream.

-

Next day was a Sunday, no work day. Jim decided to stay home for he didn’t have plans. He took a bath, and got into some nice shirt and khaki shorts. He sat down and watched the television as he ate some chips.

Someone knocked on the door, he looked at his watch, it was just 9AM, too early for the landowner to come to ask him to drop some cash advance. “Who could it be?” He whispered and opened the door. He turned speechless, his feet abruptly turned into a hard cement as he saw Mayim standing at the doorsteps. “Miss Mayim?” He uttered in surprise. “Hey!” She exclaimed. “Sorry, I wasn’t able to inform you that I’m coming.” She apologized making him wonder. “Are you ready?” She asked. He felt clueless. He gasped and grabbed his phone in his pocket and checked on the inbox.

Hang out tomorrow? You can’t say no.

An unread message from last night. “Oh.” He uttered. She smiled at him. “You can’t say no.” She said. He was too busy thinking about her last night that he didn’t check his phone at all. She looked at him and thought his clothes were good already. She grabbed his hand and pulled him over to her car, he had no choice and he wanted to be with her too anyway.

“Wait, I forgot my wallet!” He panicked. She held his hand stopping him. “No need, put it all on me.” She winked at him. “To the theme park.” She told her driver. “Theme park?” He asked. “Yeah. We’ll have some fun.” She told him.

After a couple of minutes, they reached their destination. The owner of the theme park was her friend and so they got the entrance for free. She immediately pulled him to the Haunted Mansion hoping she would hear him scream but it ended up that she was the one screaming in fear. She found it inevitable to control herself in shock and surprise, she was tightly squeezing his arms and unconsciously burying her face in his biceps. On another hand, instead of being shocked and surprised by horror, Jim got his attention to how close she was to him inside the mansion, he could feel butterflies trying to explode in his stomach.

As soon as they reached the exit, Mayim realized she didn’t hear him shout. “You didn’t even shout. What the hell?” She complained and got them laughing. “I know.” She uttered and pulled him to the Space Mountain. As they were almost in front of the line, Jim failed to resist his urge of asking. “What is this ride?” He asked looking so clueless because everything was dark.

“A roller coaster in the dark.” She winked at him. “Next, ma'am and sir.” The lady assisted them. His eyes grew. “A roller coaster?!” He asked as they assisted the passengers of the ride with their designated seats and seatbelts. “Enjoy.” She uttered, the ride started to move. “Oh my goodness.” He uttered. She felt thrilled. The ride began to move slowly forward and slightly increasing its speed and going fast after the first loop. Jim shouted in fun and fear as the ride hastened. Mayim couldn’t see him but she could clearly hear him making her laugh so hard. “Aaaaaaaaaaaaah!!!!” He shouted. She couldn’t stop laughing barely noticing that he was already embracing her. After several loops, the ride stopped and a slight light shined through them making them realize how close they were. He looked at her with his lips just an inch away from her, she hoped he would kiss her but he didn’t. “I’m sorry.” He apologized and fixed himself as the ride freed them from their seats.

“Wanna eat?” She asked him. He still felt embarrassed. “Sure.” He uttered. She bought some nachos and cheese sauce. “That was so fun!” She recalled. “I didn’t know you can produce louder sounds.” She joked and fed him with a piece of nacho looking so sweet. “Oh no. I’m so embarrassed.” He closed his eyes. “I think it’s cute.” She smiled at him. He looked at her as she continued eating the nachos while they were walking.

Soon after they rode the other rides, the decided to go home.

As she arrived at home, she started to evaluate her feelings. She felt so happy around him, so happy that she almost forgot that she broke up with Ryan and that he cheated on her. It felt like nothing to her, she thought that she just wanna be with Jim all the time. She felt safe, loved and sincerely valued which she never felt from any other man. She knew he liked her for being her, not just because he wants to have sex with her and she loved that feeling.


	4. Broken Expectations

It was early morning, Jim made some origami roses for Mayim after he took a bath later realizing that he was actually running late for work. He prepared and ran to the office as fast as he could. 

“You’re late.” Mayim was reading some documents and told him as he arrived. He immediately went on his desk and fixed the necessary things for the day. “I’m sorry, miss Mayim.” He apologized, she was expecting for an explanation but she didn’t hear any. “Why are you late?” She asked. “I’m sorry-”

“I don’t need your apologies, I need explanation.” She squelched, she felt a bit disappointed with his tardiness, she kind of missed him. He turned speechless and a bit intimidated. He bowed his head and took the origami flowers he made for her and handed it to her making her disappointment turn into a discreet blush. “What’s this for?” She asked. “Uhm… I made it for you… Because I can’t afford to buy expensive flowers.” He explained shyly. She glared at him and transitioned into a smile. “Is this a bribe for your tardiness? Because it’s working. Thanks.” She replied and placed it on a small vase on her desk. “At least this doesn’t die.” She touched the origami and appreciated his work. “You’re welcome, miss Mayim.” He replied and blushed. 

“Mayim, can we talk?” Ryan ambushed her office cutting off their moment. Ryan stared at Jim asking him to go back to his desk. “Excuse me?!” Ryan glared at him, hewalked back and sat down on his desk. 

“What do you want?” She retorted. “Babe. I came here to apologize.” He began the drama. “I’m sorry. I feel so bad. I know I lied to you. I cheated and it’s so… Bullshit for me to do that especially to someone like you.” He continued. “I know I was wrong and I swear, I regret everything. Mayim, I want you back. I love you. Believe me.” He tried to persuade her. Mayim remained quiet torn up whether to accept his apology or not. “Babe, I realized you’re the best that I could ever have. You understand me, you accept me for who I am… You love me sincerely. You’re beautiful, you’re perfect.” He continued. At some points she wanted to forgive him, she kind of missed him but on another story, she kinda enjoyed Jim’s company that she almost moved on with Ryan. 

“Come on, babe. I love you. Let me prove that to you.” Ryan continued persuading her and grabbed her hips and snuggled her. Jim felt awkward watching them snuggle in front of him, he did his best to distract himself. 

Ryan cupped Mayim’s face and kissed her. She was dodging from his lips at first but she gave into him after few more trials from him. “I missed you, babe.” He uttered and gazed into her eyes. She felt so weak, and fooled by his words again. Her love for him hasn’t ran out yet and she had no choice but to forgive him. “I love you, too.” She replied but still trying to act hard on him. Ryan knew he got her again. “That’s my baby.” He uttered and continued kissing her and ended up slightly making out in front of Jim. 

Jim felt broken as he heard her return an I love you to him that easy. He thought Ryan didn’t deserve her for he keeps on cheating on her, yet, he felt like a loser with the fact that she loves him even if he wasn’t that faithful to her when he (Jim) is there secretly loving her for over five years already and all he can do is look at her from afar and wish she’ll love him like he loves her. He felt so broken and ended up staring at the origami flowers he made for her. 

Ryan left and went back to his office. Jim’s uncle messaged him about booked reservation for fishing kit for two at the fishing pond where he was working. He felt excited and told Mayim about it. 

“Oh! The fishing. Cool. What time should we go tomorrow?” Mayim asked. “My uncle said we can go there anytime between 9am to 9pm.” He replied. “Oh. Okay. Then after work maybe? Around five or six?” She suggested and he agreed. He planned to give her a little surprise with the help of his uncle. He requested his uncle to buy a blue fishing kit and have Mayim’s name engraved on the fishing rod so that she can use it every time they go fishing for he knew that she loves color blue and she is so thrilled to try fishing as her hobby.

-

The next day came, Jim couldn’t contain himself, he was so excited to show her his surprise. Mayim was a bit busy that day that he tried to wait until she becomes free before he reminded her about their fishing visit. 

It was already 2pm, Mayim’s tasks lessened and Jim had the chance to remind her already. “Uhm, excuse me, Miss Mayim.” He politely took his attention. “Uhm, we’re still going to the fishing pond later, right?” He asked hesitantly. Suddenly she recalled something. “Oh. Yeah. The fishing… I almost forgot.” She retorted. “Yeah. My uncle had reservation for us already.” He said happily. “Yeah… Cool.” She uttered seeming to feel bad. Jim’s smiley face turned into a curious one wondering why was she responding that way. “Uhm… Jim… I can’t go.” She confessed breaking his heart a bit. “I’m sorry. I have a dinner with Ryan tonight.” She added breaking him even more. “Oh…“ He uttered in disappointment. “Did you have reservation for two already?” She asked. “Uhm… Yeah. For us.” He uttered. “Ugh. I’m sorry.” She apologized, she immediately grabbed her wallet and took $100 and handed it to him.

“Here. Take this. I’m sorry I can’t go. Use this to pay my part for the reservation… Just bring your friends or someone else because I really can’t go.” She suggested. Suddenly, Ryan entered the office again. “Hey.” He uttered and looked at Mayim. “Let’s have some coffee?” He invited her and she agreed leaving Jim behind the office. 

Jim felt so down, he stared at the $100 she handed him and thought that it’s not what he needs, it’s her that he needs. He went back to his desk and sat down as he dialed his uncle’s number. 

 _Uncle: Hey Jimmy boy!_  
Jim: Hello uncle.  
Uncle: I already got the blue fishing kit from the one customizing it. It looks perfect.   
Jim: Really? Wow. That’s great.  
Uncle: So what time will you and Mayim be coming here?  
Jim: I’ll be there at six… Miss Mayim can’t make it.  
Uncle: What? Why? I thought-  
Jim: Log story, uncle. I’ll tell it to you when I get there. I still have papers to finish. I’ll try to call you when I am about to go there, okay?  
Uncle: Alright then. Take care, Jimmy boy.

Jim sighed as his uncle hung up. He felt sad then, as he recalled that Mayim can’t come with her that day. 

-

Jim went straight to the fishing pond where his uncle works at and fished with his uncle as they share some deep conversations. His Uncle Jed acted like a dad to him since he was young. He always felt comfortable sharing things about Mayim to him since he fell in love with her. 

Uncle Jed handed him the blue fishing kit and showed to him the fishing rod with Mayim’s name on it. Jim sighed and faked a smile. “Too bad she isn’t here to see it.” He uttered. “Why wasn’t she able to come again?” Uncle asked. “She got back with her boyfriend…” He spilled. “Oh.” Uncle Jed uttered in surprise. “I know.” Jim retorted and sighed. He moved his sight to the pond. “I should have not expected so much.” He began. “She might have kissed me before but I guess that was her thing. She does that to everyone and it’s silly for me to think it meant something to her like it meant something to me.” He continued. “You really love her, don’t you?” Uncle Jed asked. “Yeah. Secretly. For over five years and here I am still hoping that one day she’ll notice me even if there are a lot of rich and successful men wooing her.” He faked some laughs. “Come on, Jimmy boy. Cheer up. It’s not yet too late. Just keep showing her how much she means to you and she’ll probably notice you too. Don’t be afraid to let her know.” His uncle tried to reverse his pessimistic thoughts. He smiled at his uncle — appreciating his effort to make him feel better — he handed him the blue fishing kit. “Give this to her next time.” He told him. “Thanks, uncle. You’re the best.” Jim uttered and they continued fishing. 

-

Jim went to work early the next day feeling a bit cheered up after confiding to his uncle about his heartaches with Mayim. “Good morning miss Mayim.” He greeted her as she entered the office. “Good morning.” She replied dully. He sat down and watched her settle down on her desk. Few moments later, Ryan followed and entered the office. Jim knew he would just flirt with her again in front of him so he pretended that he was reading something. 

Ryan began to flirt with Mayim again, grabbing her hips, being too close to her, kissing her and being all clingy. “You look beautiful today, babe. Everyday.” He complimented her. “What do you want?” She blushed. “What do I want? I want you.” He replied trying to make her blush even more. “You know, I loved what you did last night.” He brought up making it inevitable for Jim not to get affected and curious. He remained to pretend he was reading. 

“You did?” She replied trying to cuddle with him. “So much. I think it’s so hot.” He replied. “Don’t you think it’s a good idea for you to come over tonight and have dinner?” He continued. “Mmm… That sounds good.” She replied and smiled at her. “And maybe some rowdy sex again?” He joked and kissed her. “Yes?” He asked as he broke from the kiss. “Whatever.” She replied. “Whatever. Yeah. I’ll see you tonight? You can’t say no.” He said “Yes. See you later.” She replied and smirked at him. 

Jim felt like he was hammered on his face as he realized that he was fishing with his uncle because Mayim wasn’t able to make it yesterday and the mere fact that she wasn’t there because she was with Ryan and spent the night with him. His cheered up feelings suddenly went down crashing again upon overhearing their conversation and watching them be all these flirty and clingy with each other. 

Jim went home and found it hard to sleep as the thought that the woman that he love the most could probably be sleeping with someone else that point of time while he is all alone in his room thinking about her. He sighed and took her photo from his wallet. “When will you ever see that I am here?” He asked and kissed her picture, he pressed her picture on his chest and closed his eyes as he tried to sleep. 

-

Few days have passed and Mayim felt guilty for not coming with Jim at the fishing pond. “Hey.” She called his attention. “I’m sorry about last time. About the fishing.” She apologized. “Oh… It’s alright, miss Mayim. I understand.” He replied and faked a smile. “No… I wanna make it up to you. I got you to reserve that place and I had it cancelled the last minute and that’s not cool.” She retorted. “How about a dinner tonight? At the Outback at Hawthorne Blvd?” She invited him and he couldn’t say no to her ever. “Alright.” He replied. “Great! Great! So… Uhm. See you there? 7PM.” She exclaimed and he nodded. 

-

Jim got on some nice polo shirt and pants and crafted some rose origami before heading to Outback at Hawthorne Blvd. He went quite earlier than their planned time, he didn’t wanna run late for her or make her wait. He took a table for two already in case she arrives. Few moments later, he realized that he has been waiting for about an hour already and it’s already 7:30PM and Mayim is still not around. He thought that she might just got caught in a bad traffic and so he continued waiting until it was already 8PM — the waiter came by him asking him if he wants to order already for about three times already but he wanted to wait for Mayim to come before he takes and order. He kept on checking his phone but there wasn’t even a single message from her. 

Suddenly, she called him up. 

 _Jim: Hello, miss Mayim!_  
Mayim: Hey, Jim.   
Jim: I’m already here at Outback. Still haven’t taken my order yet because I’m still waiting for you.   
Mayim: Jim. *sighs* I’m sorry, I couldn’t make it… Again.   
Jim: You can’t make it? 

Jim replied as disappointment welcomed him again. 

 _Mayim: Yeah. Something came up and Ryan’s mother came home from Paris and there was a small family gathering at their house. I had to attend._  
Jim: Oh…   
Mayim: I’m so so sorry, Jim. I’ll make it up to you next time. I owe you big now. I’m so sorry.   
Jim: It’s okay, miss Mayim.

Suddenly, he heard Ryan speaking over the phone telling Mayim to hung up already for the gathering is about to start. 

_Mayim: Jim, I gotta go. Bye!_

She hung up from the other line even before he was able to say goodbye. Jim’s heart fell apart once again because of her. He had an origami bouquet of roses made for her but she didn’t even see it at all. He was hoping to exchange some nice conversations with her during their planned dinner but she wasn’t able to make it again and it just breaks him that the reason behind all these is because she is has a commitment with Ryan which is apparently the boyfriend of the girl of his dreams, worse is, he can’t do anything about it because he’s just a ‘nobody’ wooing and secretly loving her.


	5. Pushing Away

One evening, while Mayim was hanging out with her friends, she opened up to them about her sudden fade of interest with Ryan.

“Do you like anyone aside from Ryan right now?” Es asked.

“Uhm… I don’t know… no.” She replied.

“Girl, you won’t lose interest with Ryan if there’s no one entertaining you right now.” Jes joined in the conversation. “I agree to that.” Es added. 

Mayim paused and thought about it. “Well… There is this guy.” Mayim began. “Interesting. Tell me about it.” Es retorted. “I’m not sure. He’s super sweet. He’s full of surprises. He’s nice. He’s thoughtful and I could really feel that his concerns for me are sincere. You know? He’s not being all that nice to me just because he wants to nail me or something like what other men do.” She shared.

“Wow. Who is this guy?” Jes asked. “Wait. Don’t tell me that’s your awkward secretary?” Es theorized, Mayim remained silent. “Oh my god, it’s him?!” Es exclaimed as they laughed about it. “If I were you, stick to Ryan. You won’t get anything from that guy. I mean, he’s so awkward and shy. What is he gonna do? Look at you? Stare at you?” Es joked. “Yeah! Unlike Ryan. He’s rich, handsome, powerful and let’s not forget. Super hot.” Jes grilled in. Mayim remained silent and just smiled. “If I were you, avoid being close to your secretary already. It’s hard if you let yourself get close to him and… hopefully not… fall in love with that. I mean, come on Mayim!” They laughed.

Since they had that conversation, Mayim got herself thinking about avoiding Jim as soon as possible. She thought that they were right, she’s not gonna get anything from him, she thought she won’t have a future with him. She concluded that she was just feeling that way because it was her first time to encounter such type of man and a man who’s that respectful and timid. “Yeah right. That’s not my type. We live for hot men!” Mayim retorted. “Yeah right!” They cheered. 

Since that day, she became a bit cold and professional when it comes to handling Jim to be able to keep a boundary between them.

-

It was a typical day at work, Mayim was busy reviewing her slides for the day’s meeting at her desk when Jim suddenly walked closer to her and handed her a simple bouquet with three stems of rose and looking at her with a polite smile. Despite that she appreciate and found it sweet, she recalled what her girl friends told her evening before that. 

“What is this for?” She asked. “Uhm, I planted a rose at home a month ago and it bloomed today so I thought it would be nice to… give it to you.” He smiled and shared shyly. Mayim sighed and made up her mind. “Jim. Look. I can’t accept these.” She refused to accept the bouquet largely disappointing him. “Jim, I am your boss and you shouldn’t give me flowers and things.” She explained slightly starting to break him. “And most of all, I’m not your girlfriend.” She added. 

“Oh…” He uttered as he felt so shattered to be rejected by her. “I’m sorry, miss Mayim…” He apologized and took the bouquet and went back to his desk feeling so humiliated and embarrassed after the unexpected rejection. He began to blame himself again for being hurt, he thought that he was being overly confident and assuming that’s why he is getting hurt – he just couldn’t blame her. Mayim saw the sadness and sorry in his eyes but she convinced herself not to bother as she recalled about what her girlfriends said about the thought of liking Jim.

-

 

It was already dark, the employees and bosses started to go home, Mayim decided to do some overtime after she had some problems in focusing on her plans with Jim at the back of her mind. Jim got on his back pack and ready to go home. “Uhm, excuse me, miss Mayim, do you still need anything else?” He asked. “Uhm…” She wanted to ask for his help but she changed her mind. “No. You can go now.” She replied and went back to typing on her computer. “Uhm. Okay…” He uttered and stood up awkwardly. “Aren’t you going home yet?” He asked. “No, I still have things to finish.” She replied professionally. “Oh… I’ll just wait for you.” He smiled and sat back down to his desk. “No. That’s not necessary. You can go now.” She refused. “It’s alright. I can wait. I’m not in hurry anyway-“ 

“Jim. You don’t have to wait for me. What do you want? A free ride home?!” She yelled at him – startling him. “No… I just wanted to make sure you’re safe when you go hom-“

“I told you I am not your girlfriend and I’m not your responsibility. Now if you have no business here at the office, just go home already.” She scolded him and stood up as she slammed her desk. He had no choice and he didn’t want to displease her. “I’m sorry…” He apologized and walked out of the office in humiliation. Mayim sat back down and sighed as she covered her eyes. 

_What am I doing?_

She hated to humiliate him and talk to him that way but she had to do it as her girlfriends’ point about Jim nagged at the back of her mind.

Jim walked at the dark aisles of the building rethinking what he did wrong for her to treat him that way yet then, even if he gets badly hurt because of her, he still loves her so much – more than anything. He stopped walking and stayed at the waiting area outside the building to wait for her until she goes home.

_At least I am sure she’ll go home safe after I see her pass by._

He thought and waited patiently for her. It took her about two hours before she finished her slides, she placed it in a USB and hid it in her bag. He saw her coming, he hid a bit and watched her as she went outside the building seeming to talk to someone over the phone. He felt relieved to see her safely about to go home when suddenly a robber suddenly robbed her bag and tried to run away.

“Hey!” Mayim shouted, she panicked as she realized her USB was on her bag. Jim immediately ran after the robber stopping him as he made a short distance. Jim got a bit physical and took her bag from the robber but the robber was persistent and gave him a jab and few punches causing him to drop to the ground though Jim was able to get the bag. The robber kicked his chest and stomach as he went down to the ground. 

Mayim panicked, good thing was there was a law officer who saw Jim and the robber and immediately yelled at them. “Hey!” The officer yelled, scaring the robber urging him to run away leaving Jim bruised and in pain at the ground with Mayim’s bag on his arms. The officer and Mayim immediately ran to him as the robber ran away. He felt numb, he couldn’t feel his legs and his stomach were sore, his cheek and lip were bleeding. They assisted him and brought him to the nearest hospital.

The nurse immediately assisted him and cleaned his wounds and worked on his bruises. He was all alone in the emergency room whilst Mayim was outside talking to the nurses. Soon then, she went to the emergency room to see him. 

He was sitting down on the bed while the nurse was putting on some ointments on his cheekbone’s abrasion. He felt anxious as she saw her looking at him, he thought that she must have been disappointed with him after she ordered him to go home and he disobeyed her words. He looked away from her in guilt as she walked closer to him – the nurse left and gave them privacy. 

“How are you feeling now?” She asked. “I’m alright.” He replied and smiled politely at her. She couldn’t help but feel guilty as she saw his abrasions and as she recalled how deep in pain he was after the robber kicked him to the ground. “I’m sorry, miss Mayim.” He apologized, she felt terribly bad as she heard him apologize after all. “What? What are you apologizing for?” She asked. “You told me to go home but I didn’t follow. I really  just wanted to make sure you’re safe.” He explained himself hoping she wouldn’t get mad. “Jim. You got hurt because of me. I should be the one apologizing.” She retorted, she didn’t know how to make him feel better so he sat beside him and held his hand. “Thank you, Jim. Really.” She uttered. He looked down and stared at her hand holding his hand and reminded himself that he shouldn’t put any meaning to it because he doesn’t stand a chance. He smiled and politely took his hand away from her grip. 

“I guess it’s part of my job to keep you safe.” He uttered and faked a giggle. The nurse came back with the hospital bill for the medications and medicines weighing $36.00.” He took his wallet from his pocket and opened it, it bothered him to see just $30.00 in it. “Uhm… what if I don’t get the antibiotics?” He asked. “The topical antibiotic is $3.00 and the mefenamic acid is $10.00 for ten tablets. It would be just $17.00 without these but we really recommend for you to take these for the faster healing of wounds and to avoid further infections.” The nurse explained. “It’s alright. I’ll just pay for the bill, I won’t buy the mefenamic and antibiotic anymore.” He requested and handed the $30.00 but Mayim stopped him and handed $100.00 to the nurse. “We’ll take all the necessary medicines.” She told the nurse.

Jim was caught in surprise. “Don’t mention it. You need it.” She uttered. “Maybe… you can just take it from my salary.” He suggested. “Jim. You saved me. This is the least thing I can do for you.” She retorted and refused his idea.

He put on his back pack and they walked out of the hospital as the doctor allowed him to go. “Come on, I’ll drive you home.” She offered him a ride. He suddenly recalled how she used his practice of hitching a ride on her car as something against him, he didn’t want her to think that way and so it urged him to refuse her offer. “No, I’ll just take the bus.” He politely replied. “Jim, it’s fine. It won’t be a nice idea to let you ride public rides with you like that.” She tried to persuade him. “It’s alright, miss Mayim. I can take care of myself.” He insisted and raised his hand to pull over a bus. “Thank you, miss Mayim. Take care on your way home.” He uttered before he rode the bus. She had no choice as he insisted to take the bus.

_How could he be so kind after all?_

She thought as she watched the bus go. She rode her car as the bus went out of her sight.

“Jim is such a nice person, very kind and polite.” Her driver, Louie, brought up as he drove her home. “Yeah. I sometimes wonder how can such people exist.” She replied. “Well, I guess you do that when you’re with someone you love.” He retorted. “What do you mean?” She giggled. “Isn’t he in love with you?” Louie asked making her a bit startled. “He probably is. I can see it in his eyes.” He continued, she just giggled and remained quiet. “You cannot not see it, miss Mayim.” He teased. She halted as it got her thinking and triggered her to think about him the whole night. 


	6. California King Bed

Jim arrived home quarter to twelve, his mother was sitting on the couch waiting for him. “What happened to you?” She asked pretending to care. “Oh nothing. Just some accident. A robber tried to snatch miss Mayim’s bag and I ran after him to recover her bag.” He explained. “Bummer. Still hoping to get noticed by that girl?” She chuckled. “Anyway, just because you got beaten up doesn’t mean that you’re excused.” She added and rubbed her fingers together asking for money from him. Despite that he didn’t want to give, he took the $30.00 from his wallet and gave it to her. “$30.00?” She snorted. “What will I do with this? Buy tampons? Give me  _all_  your money. All of it.” She demanded. “That’s all I got, mom…” He tried to explain. “ Jim, if you’re gonna keep going home with these coins, you better work your ass off some more!” She began yelling at him. “How about the girl your drooling over with? The Mayim? You know, your boss? She’s rich right? Flirt with her some more and get some money from her!” She affronted him. “Please don’t talk to her like that. I don’t like her because of her money-“

“Then fuck off! Stop crawling over that bitch if you are looking for some gooey cliché love affair because you know what? She’s rich, beautiful, successful, smart and you’re so below her league. You’re dumb, you’re an ass, you’ve got nothing, you’re worthless!” She put him down. “You don’t use this!” She pointed at his forehead. “You’re stupid! She’ll never notice you so stop dreaming and fuck off.” She continued and threw the $30.00 bill at him and walked away leaving him broken and humiliated.

He felt so down as he felt that her words were true. He doesn’t and will never stand a chance on Mayim. He went to his room feeling so dejected and looked at Mayim’s picture trying to convince himself to stop dreaming about her already because it’s never gonna happen.

_Never._

_-_

The next days have been rough for Jim, he tried his best to avoid himself from further falling for Mayim and the fact that he feels like she doesn’t notice it because she doesn’t care at all hurts him even more. She would still act like the usual, be sweet to her boyfriend, Ryan, make out and kiss him in front of him and it breaks him – he can’t do anything about it anyway. She didn’t force him to love her, it was his will. Little did Jim know that Mayim noticed his sudden coldness but she just convince herself to shrug it off, just like his mindset, she thinks that she doesn’t have the right to complain because she’s not his girlfriend. 

Mayim arrived at the office when suddenly, something caught her attention. She saw Jim and the finance department head, Kaley Cuoco, talking to each other and she noticed how ecstatic Kaley was whilst talking to him. Despite that she wants to shrug it off, she went straight to her office and tried to forget about it but it annoys her – she’s jealous.

_So that’s why he’s being cold? Because she has another chick he’s praising. What an ass. He isn’t different, he’s just like the other fuck boys. Damn it._

Meanwhile, Jim entered the office smiling. “Good morning, miss Mayim.” He greeted and she didn’t respond. She was stealing glances at him as he sat down his desk – still smiling while using his phone. She thought of something to be able to talk to him. She took her recent project’s folder and strode to his desk. 

“Can you get me five copies of this file?” She asked him. He took the folder and stood up. “Of course.” He replied, she was annoyed how he seem not to notice the anger in her tone. “Make it ten.” She haltered him. “Alright.” He replied politely, she hated how he was still smiling. “No, just five.” She interfered. “Uhm. Five or ten?” He asked. “Five.” She replied and he left. She sat back down to her desk so annoyed of how happy he seems to be when he’s being cold to her. He returned with the five copies and handed it to her. 

“This is bullshit.” She complained and crumpled the copies and glared at his stunned reaction. “What are you waiting for? Get me another copies of this!” She yelled at him and he nodded seeming to panic.

He returned with nothing. “Where is it?” She asked. “The operator said the Xerox machine ran out of ink.” He informed her. “So what? Is it my problem that it ran out of ink? Should I buy one for you?” She retorted. “No. I’m sorry. I’m just gonna go out and have these Xeroxed.” He replied anxiously. “Really? You’re gonna let the risk of getting my projects stolen happen by having it photocopied outside this building? Are you out of your mind?!” She yelled at him, he didn’t know what to do. “Oh. No. I’m sorry, miss Mayim.” He quickly apologized.

“What is happening to you, Jim? You’re out of your mind lately.” She scolded him. “I’m sorry, miss Mayim.” He replied as his voice faded. “Maybe you should focus a little bit more on your job than your personal issues and… relationships.” She pointed out and glared at him. “I’m really sorry. It won’t happen again.” He replied. She felt bothered that he didn’t explain about the aspect of his relationship and personal issues and it made her severely jealous. 

“Excuse me.” Kaley entered her office cutting off the intervention. She didn’t notice that there was some scolding going on that’s why she was able to keep her jolly aura. “Mayim, can I talk to Jim for a while?” She asked. Mayim tried to reply professionally, she raised her eyebrows and moved her sight to her computer. Jim went out with Kaley. 

Mayim couldn’t stop herself from getting bothered with Jim and Kaley’s sudden interactions, she gets jealous and it urged her to get hard on him at the workplace which he openly coped with. There were times when she would talk provocatively to Ryan in front of Jim to get back on him but it wasn’t enough.

-

“Hey. What’s this?” Ryan asked as he saw Jim at the canteen with a set of blue fishing kit. “Oh, it’s a fishing kit. Miss Cuoco wants to see it.” He replied. Ryan check on the kit and saw Mayim’s name engraved on it. “Wow. It says Mayim.” He uttered looking so fascinated. Jim felt a bit embarrassed and anxious as he realized that he saw Mayim’s name on it. He felt nervous that Ryan might confront him.

“Uh, yeah, Mayim is Hebrew for water. You know, fishing… water. They’re related.” He made an excuse. “Cool. Cool. Are you selling this?” Ryan asked. “Oh not really.” He replied. “Come on, name your price. I’ll buy this.” Ryan persuaded him. “I’ll give it to Mayim.” He added. Despite that Jim didn’t wanna give it to him, the fact that he wants to give it to Mayim made him change his mind. “No, you can have it.” Jim replied. “Seriously?” Ryan replied. “Cool, Jim. Cool. Thanks!” He replied delightedly and immediately took the kit. Even if he wasn’t able to give it to Mayim before, at least, she’ll have it now, maybe not from him but from Ryan. What matters to him is the thought that she’ll have it now.

-

“Hello, babe.” Ryan entered Mayim’s office and quickly handed her the fishing rod and kit. She checked on it and saw her name engraved on it. She loved it, she appreciated it so much. The fact that she wants to try fishing and that it is blue makes her love it even more. “Wow. This is so sweet. Thank you, babe. I love you.” She uttered and kissed him. Ryan felt so glad that he effortlessly made her happy but what he thought is that he can get her laid with him because of that. “So can I get a gift too?” Ryan brought up as they broke from the kiss. “Anything you want.” She replied. He smirked at her and discretely grabbed her posterior. “Fine.” She replied and smiled at him. “Ah! I’ll see you tonight then?” He replied exultantly. “I’ll be at your place around seven.” She teased him by kissing him insolently. “See you later.” She uttered and allowed him to go.

-

Later that day, Jim asked Mayim for an early dismissal so he could assist his uncle on the fishing pond – she allowed him to go for it’s better than to see him around the office getting cold on her.

As she was about to go home, she unexpectedly went down the elevator with Kaley and she couldn’t resist to ask her about Jim. “Hey.” She greeted Kaley. “Hey, Mayim.” Kaley replied. “I noticed you frequently with Jim. What’s up with you two?” She asked trying not to sound like a jealous girl. She giggled. “Oh yeah, I just started fishing as my hobby at the fishing spot where his uncle works.” She shared. “Oh. Cool. Didn’t know you like fishing.” Mayim replied. “Yeah, I just started actually and Jim is guiding me with everything, you know. He’s a nice guy.” Kaley retorted. 

_He’s a nice guy_

Mayim didn’t like her statement very much. “Oh. Are you some kind of dating? You know. You seem very close.” She asked making her chuckle. “Seriously? No. I think we both no who he likes.” She replied as they went down the elevator, Kaley taking few steps ahead of Mayim made her panic a bit. “Wait.” Mayim stopped her. “Who?” She asked. “Mayim, you cannot not see it.” Kaley replied but Mayim still felt unsure. “He likes you, come on.” Kaley cleared up and smirked at her before she turned around and walked ahead leaving her behind.

_He did? He told Kaley that he likes me?_

She felt a bit relieved. She finally confirmed that he wasn’t going after Kaley and that what he and Kaley are doing is purely for business. She suddenly recalled how hard she became to him and it made her remorse. 

-

It was a typical work day afternoon when Kaley dropped by Mayim’s office to ask Jim about her fishing lessons every weekend but he wasn’t there. 

“Hey! Where’s Jim?” Kaley asked and entered the room. “He went down I think? I don’t know.” She replied.

 Kaley saw her fixing a familiar blue fishing kit. She went closer to her hyped.

“Wow! Jim gave it to you already!” She exclaimed making Mayim wonder. “Oh no, it wasn’t from Jim, it’s from Ryan.” She corrected her. Kaley snorted.   
  


“You don’t have to hide it from me, I know it’s from Jim.” She assured. “No, it’s really from Ryan.” Mayim insisted making Kaley wonder. She took the fishing rod and checked on it, the engraved name, the texture, she was sure it was Jim’s.

Suddenly, Jim entered the office after photocopying some documents downstairs.

“Perfect. Jim come here.” Kaley called him. “This is yours right?” Kaley asked. “Oh… uhm. Yeah.” He uttered.

“Miss Kaley? Mr. Heinz wants you in his office.” Her secretary called her urging her to leave Jim and Mayim behind. As soon as Kaley left, silence swarmed the office. Jim didn’t wanna make things awkward and so he walked towards his desk and fixed his body bag ready to go home whilst Mayim remained standing confused about the fishing kit.

“Do you still need anything else, miss Mayim?” Jim asked. Mayim remained silent and just looked at him torn whether to let him leave or ask about the fishing kit.

“Hey.” Ryan entered the office and kissed Mayim. “Hey…” Mayim replied still bothered by the fishing kit. “Uhm, can I ask where did you get these?” She asked. Jim looked at them. 

“Oh. It was from Jim. I got it from him. I saw it from him few days ago and I saw your name in it and so I thought it would be a nice gift to you so I asked him if I could buy it but he gave it to me instead and said… What is it that you said…?” He tried to recall, Jim remained silent.

“Uhm… you want her to have it anyway. Because you like fishing and your name is in the rod.” He continued. 

Mayim was so happy when she had the rod, she loved it, but after knowing that it was originally from Jim made her value and appreciate it more and the mere fact that he wanted her to think that it was from Ryan. He didn’t care about the recognition of the effort, what mattered to him is that it made her happy.

“Babe.” Ryan called her attention. “Are you alright?” He asked. “Yeah. Yeah. I’ll just fix my things.” She replied. “Okay, I’ll just wait for you at the lobby, okay?” He retorted and kissed her before he left.

Jim continued fixing his things and went out of her office. They went inside the elevator together. “Why didn’t you give it to me?” She asked. He gulped and just smiled lightly at her. Few seconds after, the elevator opened at the lobby. “When did you get this?” She asked as they made a few steps away from the elevator. He stopped and smiled shyly. 

“Do you remember when you asked me to reserve a fishing spot for… us before?” He began. She started to recall. “I asked my uncle to get me a personalized fishing kit with your name on it because you said you wanna make this your hobby… and I thought it would be nice if you would have your own fishing kit.” He shared unintentionally making her feel guilty for ditching him that time for Ryan. “Oh.” She uttered.

Ryan heard their voices from across the lobby. “Hey.” He called her attention ending Jim and Mayim’s conversation. “Let’s go?” He asked. Jim felt down again as he always felt like a trash and invisible whenever Ryan comes around. All opportunities he could have with Mayim simply vanish when he comes and that moment just proved it. “Come on.” Ryan demanded and held her hand leading them to go leaving Jim behind all alone. She didn’t resist and as usual, she wasn’t that determinate and strong enough to stay for him.  
  


_I’ll never have her. She’ll never choose me. It’ll always be like a California king bed. So close yet so far._

  
Jim thought and went home alone.


	7. She’s an Angel

Jim stood by the bus stop waiting for one to come when suddenly a duo robbed his bag. He tried to come after them but they were riding a motorcycle and was able to escape quickly.

He was left with nothing but a few pennies on his pocket, luckily, it was enough for him to take a bus to go home. During the ride, he felt worried of what his mother could do when she asks for money from him and he can’t get any, he knew she won’t accept the excuse that he was robbed.

-

As expected, his mother outraged when he wasn’t able to hand him some money but what’s worse was she was more furious that moment than before because she caught her boyfriend cheating on her earlier that day and she vented out her fury to Jim.

“I’m so sorry, mom, I didn’t expect for them to rob me-“

“Get out of this house!!!” She yelled furiously. Jim was stunned upon hearing her. “But…” He uttered.

“I said leave!!! You don’t want? Don’t try me.” She felt dared and went to his room and pulled out a huge bag and threw all his things in it forcing him to leave. “Mom, please. I don’t have a place to go, I’ll make it up-“

“I don’t care! Leave you fucking useless shit! Out!!!” She continued yelling and pushed him out. Despite that he tried to persuade her to let him stay, she was just too infuriated to hear him out. She shut the door next to his face.

Jim felt so troubled, clueless of where to go, he didn’t have money to rent even a bed space for that evening. He suddenly thought about Mayim. He had no choice but to ask help from her.

-

“Miss Mayim, someone’s looking for you.” Her house helper informed her. She wasn’t expecting any visitor and she disliked unexpected guests. “Who the hell comes at this point of time?  _(11:26PM)”_ She complained and went down with her forehead wrinkled in displease.

“Jim?!” She uttered in surprise. She looked at him and saw him carrying a huge bag, making her wonder what was his purpose. He looked so humiliated and shy upon seeing her.

“What happened?” She asked. 

“I’m so sorry to bother miss Mayim but I don’t know anywhere else to go…” He began. “I know this sounds so unprofessional but I really need your help.” He continued. “Okay? How can I help you?” She sounded so worried for she knew he won’t come like that all of a sudden if it wasn’t important. “Can I…” He hesitated to continue. “It’s okay, go on.” She uttered. “Can I take some cash advance? I just need some money right now to rent a place to stay… I… I’m really sorry. I just don’t have any money and place to go…” He said reluctantly. She was perplexed with his request. “Don’t you have a house?” She questioned him. “My… I got thrown out of my house… by my mom.” He aversely shared desperately needing her help. Her jaw dropped in surprise. “Your own mother threw you out? What did you do?” She asked and later realized she was going a bit far. “I’m sorry. Okay. Uhm… How much do you need?She asked. “Really? Uhm… You can deduct it on my salary for the next months… It would be a huge help.” He retorted. She thought it was a bad idea, lending him would just bury him into debts. “Where do you plan to go?” She asked. “I really don’t know…” He uttered. Suddenly, she thought of a better plan. 

Jim stood by and watched Mayim whisper something to her house helper and her house helper nodding after. He felt clueless of what was she planning. Her house helper took his bag from him making him ponder more. “The guest room is vacant, you can stay there for the mean time.” She informed him startling him. He didn’t know how to respond, he badly needed a place to stay but at the same time he didn’t wanna bother her. “But-“

“No more buts. It’s vacant anyway. You can stay there until you save enough money to rent a decent apartment.” She continued. “If I lend you money now, you’ll just get buried in debts. It’s both detrimental to us.” She added. “Miss Mayim… I… I don’t know what to say… Thank you so much! Really.” He mumbled and hugged her tightly making it a bit awkward. She chuckled. “Okay…” She uttered. He bowed his head in humiliation as he broke the hug. “I’m sorry but… thank you so much. If there’s anything I could do to pay this, just… say it. Thank you.” He ran out of words to be able to tell her how grateful he was. “It’s fine.” She replied. “Please assist him.” She told her house helper before she went up to her room.

“This way, sir.” The house helper lead him to the guest room. The guest room was perfect. It’s large enough for him, it has a nice bed, dresser, cabinets and bathroom. It made him feel more grateful. “Thank you so much.” He thanked the house helper before she left.

As Mayim entered her room, she pressed her rear at her door and found herself smiling upon realizing that Jim will be staying at the same roof she’s at. She felt that making him stay for free would be a nice start to pay back all the things he did for her. She laid down on her bed and thought about him and what she could do for the next days with him.

Her house helper knocked at her door before she entered. “Miss Mayim? Your milk.” She informed him. “Just leave it there.” She uttered and sat down. “Do you need anything, ma’am?” Her house helper asked. She paused and thought of something. “Uhm, bring glass of milk for Jim too.” She ordered her. “Alright.” The house helper replied. “Also!” She stopped her from leaving. “Starting tomorrow, make the daily meals good for two.” She requested before her house helper left.

 - 

Jim woke up early and made his budget for his breakfast and dinner and decided to skip lunch to save up before he took a bath and get ready for work.

“Breakfast is ready, Sir Jim.” The house helper informed him as soon as he went out of his room. “Breakfast?” He wondered and looked at the dining table. He was mesmerized when he saw the bacon sandwich. “Wait, uhm. Is this free?” He asked making them giggle. “Yes, sir. Miss Mayim told us to prepare your meals during your stay here.” They replied making him grateful and shy at the same time. “Wow. Uhm… thank you so much. Wow…” He felt speechless. He wanted to thank Mayim but they said she went to the office early

The house helpers loved Jim’s company, they were used to encountering arrogant and conceited guests but he was different, he was down to earth and very nice. They felt comfortable around him to the point that they were able to ask him some personal questions. “So are you dating miss Mayim?” They asked as they were clueless that he was just her secretary. “Oh no.” He blushed. “Oh my, you’re blushing!” They teased him. He couldn’t help but blush when they tease him to Mayim. “No… we’re not dating. I’m just her secretary.” He cleared. “But do you like her?” They continued teasing. His face turned pink making them giggle. “What is not to like on miss Mayim, right?” He retorted making them squeal. “Oh my goodness! You look good together!” They teased. 

“Among all the men who wooed miss Mayim, I think you’re my favorite.”

“You’re very nice and charming!”

“You’re perfect for miss Mayim.”

“Looks like you will take care of her so well.”

They teased him to her making him blush and turn red. “So how long have you liked miss Mayim?” They asked. “Uhm… five years-“

“FIVE YEARS?!?” They exclaimed. 

“That is so unconditional!”

“Why aren’t you together yet?”

He chuckled and his smile faded upon realizing. “Because I’m kind of out of her league. I mean… she’s heaven and I’m at the ground.” He felt down. The hype among them went down as they realized how rich and powerful Mayim’s exes were. It’s quite impossible for her to notice him if he’s just her secretary. “Aww. It doesn’t matter. You’re still our favorite.” They cheered him up. “There’s nothing impossible in love.” They pointed out making his frown turn into a smile of hope.

- 

“Where’s Jim?” Mayim asked the house helpers when she got home and discovered he wasn’t home yet. 

“He said he’ll look for some side works today.” They informed her. Mayim pretended as if she doesn’t care though deep inside she was expecting to see him as soon as she got home. She went up to her room and saw something at the top of her bed. It was Jim’s eminent origami flowers accompanied with a small note.

_You’re an angel from above._

At the back of the note was his sketch of her with an angel wings. It made her smile and blush – she found him so sweet.

-

It was a Sunday morning, Jim was busy reviewing the draft of Mayim’s slides on the living room alone when he heard her foot steps going down from her room heading to the pool with her white robe on.

“Miss Mayim, I reviewed the slides for the presentation this Wednesday, I saw that the chart on the third slide wasn’t updated yet with the new data.” He informed her but she seemed not to be so interested. “Jim, it’s Sunday. Let’s not stress ourselves with work.” She replied making him think. 

“Why don’t you just relax…” She untied her robe and took it off in front of him revealing her flawless body in some high waist bottom and bandeau top swimsuit. “…and let’s talk about it later.” She continued and handed him her robe as she smirked at him before heading to the pool to swim. 

He literally lost air to breathe in as she flashed her curves next to his eyes. He gulped roughly and tried to keep himself together as he recovers from what he just saw.

Mayim smirked on her own as she saw Jim’s face turning bright red. He turned around and headed back to the living room. She felt relieved that she still makes him blush like that.


	8. I Love You?

“Hey.” Mayim uttered awkwardly as Ryan appeared on her doorsteps later in the evening unexpectedly.

“What are you doing here?” She asked. “Really? That’s the first thing you’re gonna tell me?” He retorted and pecked her lips. “I missed you that’s why.” He uttered and continued kissing her.

“Miss May-” Jim paused as he saw Ryan and Mayim kissing. Ryan looked at him bewildered by his presence. “Jim?” He uttered. 

“Uhm, hello sir Ryan.” He greeted him.

“What is he doing here?” He asked her.

Mayim and Jim looked at each other wondering who would explain. “Well. He got thrown out by his mother so I allowed him to stay here for the mean time. Just the mean time.” She explained. Ryan felt a very minimal disturbance with his presence around his girlfriend’s house especially that he knows how aggressive Mayim could be but then he recalled how conservative Jim was. 

“What you got there?” Ryan asked and strode towards him about to check the documents he was holding.

“I was about to show these slides to miss Mayim for reviewing-”

Ryan stopped walking towards him and walked back to Mayim after hearing that it was about work. “Oh, you can show that to her later.” Ryan told Jim and cuddled Mayim as his arm were around her. “I’m gonna show her first how I slide it inside.” He threw a dirty joke making Jim feel awkward. She suppressed her awkward reaction as she knew how Jim was listening and standing in front of them.

Jim exhaled heavily and headed back to his room leaving them behind. She felt bad for making him feel bad and hurt but she felt like she can’t do anything about it.

As what they used to do, Ryan and Mayim spent sometime making out and heating up their bodies with each other. He always enjoyed dominating rowdy and roughly making him completely exhausted after ever round they do.

She felt very unusual during their intercourse. She felt bothered, she was thinking about Jim and about how he could possibly feel that very moment and it was all unusual to her to think of things like that during that time when she should be feeling heated up and all lascivious. “Damn you’re so hot, babe.” Ryan complimented her as they reached their peak. He dropped himself on her side and recalled the pleasure while she felt unfocused – she waited until he fell asleep.

She couldn’t stop thinking about Jim, she felt guilty for sleeping with Ryan knowing that Jim is on the same roof as them. She looked at the time and it was almost twelve. She got her robe on and go down to the kitchen. She silently sneaked out the room and unexpectedly saw Jim sweeping the floor outside. 

“Hey.” She greeted him quietly.

“Oh. Hello miss Mayim.” He replied and smiled at her pretending he’s all fine. 

“Why are you sweeping the floor? Let the house helpers do that and get some rest already.” She told him. “It’s alright miss Mayim. This is the least thing I could do to thank you for letting me stay here… for the mean time.” He retorted. She ran out of words to respond. He continued sweeping and she decided to just continue walking down to the kitchen to escape the awkward silence but she suddenly stopped at the bottom of the stairs.

Her urge to talk to him and comfort him felt like a strong magnet that very moment. She wanted to tell him about how she was feeling and all the unusual things she has been feeling since they became closer together. She exhaled heavily and decided to go up again.

“Hey.” She called his attention. He looked at her wondering why she came back. She was a bit hesitant. “Can we talk?” She asked.

“Of course. What is it about?” He responded politely.

“Uhm. Can we talk somewhere else? Somewhere more private?” She requested as she wanted to stay a bit distant from her room where Ryan was sleeping.

“Alright.” He replied and wondered where. “Your room would be nice.” She suggested and lead the way.

She closed the door next to them and tried to build courage to start a conversation with him. He stood distantly and waited for her to talk.

“Okay… uhm…” She mumbled. “How do I start this…” She uttered clueless of where and how to start, he patiently waited for her to organize her thoughts.

“I don’t know. Everything feels so new to me and it’s weird…” She began talking about her feelings while he was clueless of what she was talking about.

“I don’t recall feeling like this before and I feel so amateur and confused…” She continued vaguely expressing her confusion. “I slept with Ryan.” She brought up making him feel bothered and more perplexed but he tried to cope up. “Like all the time. In every kind of way actually but… It felt uncomfortable and odd this time. I don’t know why…” She exhaled heavily every after statement she says. 

“But I couldn’t stop thinking about you.” She spilled slowly startling him. “When he was kissing me and touching me… and you were there. I wanted to stop him. I didn’t want you to see that, Jim… I don’t know what is this.” She sounded so troubled. “I don’t know why I feel this way? I don’t want anyone anymore. I want you.” She started confessing.

“I like you.” She spilled.

Jim felt like his feet turned into a hard cement upon hearing her. He was speechless for a moment. “I guess it is normal to like your employees.” He replied.

“No. No… No. It’s not like that. I don’t- how do I say this? I don’t wanna see you sad. I don’t want you to get hurt? Is this love? I don’t know. I love you?” She retorted vaguely.

“You don’t seem to be so sure.” He pointed out still looking stunned from what he was hearing. Mayim paused for a while and looked at him as her emotions swallowed her. 

“I love you.” She repeated but she sounded sure this time.

Jim flabbergasted for a moment as it sank to him, he remained silent. “Please tell me you feel the same way too because I’m not used to being rejected.” She pleaded. He closed his eyes and uttered words. “I hope this is not just another dream.”

She watched him hopelessly wish things. “No it’s not.” She whispered softly. He opened his eyes and saw her close to him already with her eyes sparkling as if it was telling him to believe her. He gulped and looked back at her green eyes as she waited for his reply. He found it so hard to believe that they were standing that close and confessing each other’s feelings to one another.

He slowly moved his hands and stroked her hair down to her face, he gazed on her as it sank to him that what was happening isn’t just a dream.

“If this is just a dream… I don’t wanna wake up. It looks so… real.” He uttered.

“Please tell me you love me too?” She pleaded softly.

“You’re… my life.His heart spoke for him as he was dazed by her. Smile slowly grew on her lips.

“I love you more than anything.” Her smile grew a bit more upon hearing him reciprocate the words of love.

“One thing for sure is you’re not dreaming.” She uttered making him smile softly at her. Their gazes deepened. “Let me show you this is real.” She uttered and kissed him.

His world stopped for a moment as their lips met, it was his very first time to kiss someone and it meant so much to him that it was her that he was kissing. It was very sentimental and intimate as they exchanged a subtle and soft kiss, it felt so dreamy but it was real. It felt like their souls were each other’s missing piece.

They had a sincere smiles for each other as they broke from their first kiss, he was dazed, he couldn’t believe that the girl she used to just dream about is standing next to him confessing and kissing him already. On another hand, she felt so different, she never felt so safe and complete before until that moment, until she was within his presence and that’s what she needed the most ever since.

He kissed her forehead before they embraced each other. “You make me feel so safe and loved and appreciated. Thank you…” She uttered in the midst of their hug as his chin rested on her head. “I never felt that from anyone, not even Ryan.” She continued.

Suddenly, he recalled that she’s still with Ryan. “Wait… what about him?” He asked looking a bit worried and scared. They broke off from the hug and looked at each other. She knew Ryan was on her shoulder. “Yeah. I’ll be breaking up with him soon.” She retorted. “Soon?” He asked. “Well… Yeah. I can’t just dump him. I don’t want him to feel like I replaced him because that would make him hate on you and I don’t want that.” She explained. He frowned a bit. “Jim…” She uttered and rested her palms on his chest. “Just give me time. I’ll fix my mess and I’ll come clean to you. Please?” She pleaded. He smiled softly. “Alright.” He uttered and hugged her again.

“Maybe you should go back to your room now before he finds out that you’re gone.” He suggested. “Yeah. Right.” She replied and walked towards the door, he watched her go. Suddenly, she stopped and turned back at him. “Just one last.” She walked towards him and placed a kiss on his lips.

They blushed in front of each other as they broke from the kiss. She grinned at him before she left.

He stood still right to where he was standing as she left. It took him a while before it sank to him that kiss and what just happened. He couldn’t believe that the girl she just used to dream about actually said ‘I love you’ to him and is kissing him already. 

_She’s no longer my dream girl, she’s now my girl._


	9. Jim’s Insecurities

Mayim and Jim decided to officially take each other as their partner, yet, they had to keep it discreet for a while while she was still with Ryan to avoid making him furious and jealous with Jim. As she was discreetly going out with Jim, she did her best to disappoint and make Ryan mad at her often so that he would initiate the break up but then it failed. She also started rejecting his cuddles and stopped sleeping with him which largely annoyed him. This lead them into consecutive arguments and a cool off upon his request. He told her to get herself together before they start going out again and it gave Jim and Mayim hope. She thought that their plan worked already, the cool off is the start for them.

Jim and Mayim went to a resort to chill and spend sometime together. Little did she expect to see her friend in the resort making her feel a bit conscious.

“Mayim!” Emily greeted upon seeing her.

“Hey.” She replied a bit stunned. Emily looked at Jim and looked back at Mayim. “Your boyfriend?” She asked. “Oh. No. Uhm… my secretary. We’re just trying to do works far from the workplace to be able to think well for the company’s next presentations. You know…” She answered defensively. Jim remained silent despite that he felt broken after she denied their relationship in front of him.

–

As they went to their room, Mayim noticed the sadness in his eyes. “Hey.” She called his attention. He smiled at her but she could still see the sadness in his eyes. “I’m sorry a while back.” She apologized. He knew he wasn’t good at pretending.

“I’m sorry.” She repeated and rested her hands on his shoulders. “Why didn’t you tell her about us?” He asked. 

“Jim…” She sighed. “I’m sorry. It’s just that… She’s Ryan’s friend too and it would be risky to tell her.” She explained. “Look. I need you to understand that this is just temporary. Soon enough… We can tell the world but for now, we have to keep this as a secret.” She continued.

Jim started to feel insecurity after realizing how people thinks that she is still with Ryan and he is just her secretary. He may have his dream girl already but the sad part is, he can’t even tell it to anyone neither can she tell to people that she’s with her.

–

Few weeks after the cool off, Mayim started being blatant in dating and going out with Jim, it was a few of the best times of their life. Ryan dated some other women as well making him less care about who Mayim is dating.

Jim and Mayim continued spending their times together for quite some time making them know each other a little bit more and fall for each other a little more harder. Thus, a relationship without arguments isn’t a real relationship. They had a few arguments as well throughout their relationship but they tend to make it up and fix it right away. Few crucial argument they always have are Jim’s fear of losing her and changing her mind about him and Mayim’s incompetence when it comes to settling.

One time, Mayim shared to Jim how Ryan was trying to reconcile with her and how she rejected it. It threatened him a bit and lead them into a small argument.

“I’m just afraid that one day you’ll wake up and realize that you don’t love me anymore and you changed your mind.” He confided. “Jim… Don’t think that way, that’s not gonna happen.” She comforted him and held his hands.

“I’m with you, right? I chose to be with you. You’re not gonna lose me. Okay?” She continued stroked his hands with her fingers. She initiated a hug to further comfort him. “I’m sorry. I just… I’m afraid to lose you. You’re my dream girl. And now that we’re together, I don’t know if I can manage to lose you.” He explained, she continued hugging him.

“I love you.” She uttered as they broke from the hug whilst gazing at each other.   
“Why don’t we get married? Even a small one. What do you think?” He suggested randomly making her feel a bit uncomfortable as marriage was brought up. 

  
“Jim… Let’s not go that far. We don’t have to rush things… it’s pressuring me.” She turned down the idea.   
“It’s just the only thing I could think of to make me feel secure with this. This thing between us. That I’m not gonna lose you.” He explained. She sighed.   
“Jim… I’m… It’s just that… I’m not ready to settle yet. I don’t know if I wanna get married it haven’t crossed my mind yet. You’re pressuring me. You’re not gonna lose me. I just need you to trust me.” She rationalized.

“I’m sorry. You’re right. I trust you. I didn’t wanna pressure you. I’m sorry.” He apologized and hugged her. “It’s fine.” She uttered and hugged him back feeling bad as she felt like she’s not helping in making him feel secure.

–

Ryan recently became a bit persistent on Mayim and despite that she is rejecting him, Jim couldn’t avoid being threatened somehow knowing how a successful, powerful and attractive – Ryan – is surrounding her girlfriend trying to win her back. He had Kaley, who supported their relationship from the start, to confide to about these thoughts bugging him.

“Jim, no offense or anything but I don’t think she is going to settle with you.” She shared his thought. “Not that you’re insufficient or anything but let’s think realistically here. She has dated a lot of men and nobody lasted. I mean she dated Ryan for years but it was still easy for her to dump him right after she met you even if he’s that famous and that rich and, let’s not forget, super hot.” She continued making him think about it deeper. 

“I think she’s just fascinated by you because you’re different. You didn’t demand sex from her and  you were hopelessly romantic kinda guy.” She added.

“But I love her more than anything and I’d do anything just to make her happy.” He retorted. Kaley found it sweet.

“But Jim… I think you don’t understand the life of rich people. We get love when we want to, it’s that easy, so in that case, saying you love her more than anything won’t make you outstand from the other men going after her. I mean, come on. I am not trying to put you down or tear your apart but I just want to clear things up to you so you can make up your mind.” She replied. He paused for a moment as her advices sank into him, he knew she had a point, he has nothing to put up against all the men wooing Mayim. He doesn’t stand a chance, he never knew this insecurity he had from the very start would linger even if she’s already with him.

No matter how much comfort and words of assurance Mayim tells him, his insecurity won’t just go away. He valued her so much and he was extremely cautious and afraid to lose her.

After the talk he had with Kaley, he got himself thinking about Mayim. He felt down and hopeless. He thought that he had no choice but to prove to her that he loves her and nobody else can love her the way he does just to keep her from changing her mind about choosing him over other men.

_She’s right. I am a nobody compared to them but I love her. I don’t wanna lose her._

– 

Mayim and Jim openly dated already but after his talk with Kaley, he had a new reason to be insecure. It also added to his insecurity how Mayim seems to be ashamed of their relationship at some instances.

“Jim. I don’t wanna argue about this again.” She begged. “I don’t know how many times do I have to explain it to you. You have nothing to worry about. I’m with you.” She assured him.

“I’m sorry. Maybe I’m being paranoid but it’s just because I love you so much.” He retorted. “And I’m afraid that one day you’ll realize you no longer love me.” He continued.

“Jim.” She uttered. ”I’m sorry if I make you feel that way. It’s just that I am adjusting. I got used to dating and going out with those kinds of men, you know what I’m talking about? And people are used to seeing me with those men. And you’re different. I’m not used to dating someone like you.” She explained.

“Someone like me?” He pondered. “Is that a good thing or a bad thing?” He asked.

Mayim felt a bit ashamed to let most of the people know that she’s dating her secretary seriously despite that she sincerely loves him. She knows how judgmental they could be and a part of her was afraid to hear insults and negative comments about him. He was too precious to her that she can’t handle to hear people talking about him negatively.

“Good thing. You’re a great guy compared to them.” She replied and hugged him. “Let me make it up to you. How about we go on a dinner tomorrow? Then at the park? Chill and bond after?” She asked.

“Who am I to reject an angel inviting me for a date?” He replied and gazed at her with a smile. “I love you.” He uttered as he couldn’t help appreciating her existence. She smiled and blushed. “I love you too.” She replied and kissed him.

Few seconds after, Ryan barged into her office seeing them cuddling. 


	10. Ryan's Persistence

“So the rumors were true.” Ryan uttered upon seeing them. “You’re dating your secretary. How shallow.” His ego seemed to feel damaged as he felt like she replaced him with just a secretary. 

 

He sneered at him. “Just because you got this girl doesn’t mean you’re cool already. Your level is still down to the ground. You’ll never be like us.” He affronted him. “Stop it, Ryan!” She tried to stop him but he insists. “She’ll get bored of you and leave you. That’s our thing.” He warned him. “Just leave!” Mayim pushed him out of her office, he smirked at Jim as he saw the self doubt across his face after what he told him. Ryan knew it was easy to manipulate him with words knowing he is that insecure with himself.

 

–

 

Ryan would always taunt and insult Jim whenever he had the chance and whenever Mayim isn’t around. Despite the effect of Ryan’s taunting to him, he decided not to tell Mayim about it anymore to keep her from worrying.

 

“Don’t you think I thought about the idea that you could just be using her for support? For free housing and loans?” He insulted him. “That’s not true. I love her and I am not using her.” Jim defended in offense. “Sure. Because she’s the best you can have because you are a nobody. Just a worthless secretary who can’t even rent his own apartment.” Ryan offended him. He couldn’t speak much, he didn’t wanna talk back to him because it wasn’t his practice despite that he is offending him too much already.

 

“Do you really think you’ve got what it takes for her to choose you over me?” Ryan made him feel insecure. “Hard to think huh?” He added. “I don’t need to compete with you. I know she loves me and I love her more than anything.” Jim retorted making him chuckle. “She loves you? Brother. She said that to me too. And to other men. So many times already. I’m not even sure if she knows what love is.” Ryan laughed. 

 

“Say whatever you want.” Jim replied. Ryan glared at him. “Jim… Jim. Poor boy. She said she loves you, she said she loves me the only difference is I fucked her so many times already. I can’t even count it with my hands. What about you?” He bragged and smiled in complacence as he walked away leaving Jim behind bombarded with insecurity and negative thoughts. 

 

–

 

Someone knocked on his door. “Come in.” Mr. Bialik uttered. Ryan came into his office for some personal talks. “Hello, uncle.” He greeted and initiated a talk as he came up with a plan. He pretended to confide to him how upset he is to see his daughter dating a secretary when he loves her dearly. He acted so sad trying to convince Mr. Bialik to help him win Mayim back.

 

“Uncle, I just wanna talk to her. Win her back. But she won’t even talk to me. Her boyfriend is always getting in the way and I can’t fight him.” Ryan confided to him. “Uncle, I love your daughter so much. I know that she’s only paying attention to Jim because she’s mad at me and she wants to make me jealous. It’s working and I want to win her back, uncle. I love your daughter so much, I wanna marry her.” He continued. “Besides, we hold a huge share in this company. Me and Mayim ending up together would give us all benefit. Right?” He pointed out. Mr. Bialik sighed as he was convinced with his persuasion.

 

“Alright, son. I’ll tell her to go to the dinner at the house. You go too so you can talk.” Mr. Bialik informed him. “Really, uncle? But… what if she won’t talk to me? He pretended to be so hopeless. “I’ll make sure you too will make up.” He assured. Ryan exhaled in relief.

 

“Thank you, uncle!” He said before he left his office feeling all complacent.

 

–

 

“What are we getting tonight?” Mayim asked Jim as they embraced each other. “Uhm… I reserved a table for two at the trattoria at seven.” Jim replied smiling. “Oh! Italian!” She squealed sounding so excited. “Then we’ll go to the park and walk around. You know.” He added. “Yeah. We love that.” She added.

 

Mr. Bialik entered her office all of a sudden startling them a bit. They distanced themselves from each other as he saw his dad’s presence. “Dad.” She uttered as he looked at them. 

 

“Meet me at home tonight for a dinner with Ryan.” He informed her. 

“With Ryan at home?” She asked. “At my house. At seven.” He cleared.

“But dad-”

“No buts. It’s important. I’ll be waiting for you tonight.” He required her and turned around no longer giving her the privilege to decline. 

Mayim looked at Jim in anxiety. Mr. Bialik paused and turned back to them again. “Keep your professionalism at the workplace. This isn’t a park where you can cuddle.” He reprimanded them before he left them speechless and guilty.

 

She saw in Jim’s eyes how he seems sad that his dad’s dinner invite conflicts with their scheduled date. “Jim…” She uttered. “It’s alright. We can reschedule it some other time. Your dad said it’s important. You should go.” He replied even if he’s hurting inside. They both know that she can’t fail her dad, she didn’t wanna upset him and Jim didn’t want her dad to be mad at her as well.

 

“No. Listen. I told you I’m gonna make it up to you.” She commenced. “Let’s meet at the park tonight, instead. At ten. I’ll leave the dinner as soon as possible.” She instructed him. A smile grew upon his lips as he felt her urge to make it up to him despite the interferences. 

 

“Alright. I’ll meet you at the park at ten.” He replied with a smile.

 

_

 

Mayim came to his dad’s house earlier than seven hoping not to be late for his call time. Ryan went up to her and hugged her as if he missed her so much and she find it very disturbing. 

 

“Dinner will be ready in a few.” The house helper informed them as they sat on the dining table. Soon then, the dinner was served.

 

“What made you call for a dinner?” She asked. His dad began by asking her about the updates at work and she gladly answered his queries. Suddenly, she received a message from Jim saying he’s already at the park. As his dad continued speaking, she got her attention divided to him and to replying to Jim. Ryan looked at Mr. Bialik seeming to infer something.

 

> Mayim: It’s just 9:00. Why so early?  
> Jim: I don’t wanna keep my girl waiting J  
> Mayim: Awww. My baby is so sweet. I’ll see you-

 

Before Mayim was able to send her reply, his dad took her phone off her hand leaving her astonished. “Dad.” She uttered.

 

“I’m talking to you and you keep on texting. Where are your manners?” He scolded her. “I’m sorry. Can I have my phone back?” She apologized. “No. You’ll have this after the dinner.” He replied. She felt anxious as his dad confiscated her phone. She had to talk to them throughout the dinner.

 

His dad began talking about how he likes her and Ryan to make it up to each other and continue working at the company as a couple pointing out the advantages of them being in good terms. Ryan roasted Mayim by pretending to be the nice guy who sincerely loves her.

 

“Dad. I’m in a relationship.” Mayim pointed out in annoyance. “With who?” Her dad asked. She haltered for a moment and looked at Ryan thinking it was all his plan.

 

“With my old secretary?” Mr. Bialik guessed, she remained silent. “You’re gonna stay here for the night and talk to Ryan. Make things up.” His dad instructed her. “But I have to go at ten.” She insisted. “Nobody is going home.” He retorted.

 

“Dad I have other business!” She replied. “What’s that business?” He asked.

“I have an important person to attend to, dad.” She vowed. “What is more important than a family talk?” His dad retorted. She stood up in exasperation. 

“Sit down and finish your food!” His dad raised his voice making her intimidated. She was forced to sit back and continue finishing her meal. Silence swarmed the dining room for a while, all they could hear is the sound of the utensils hitting their plates as they eat.

 

Soon then, they were able to finish their meal. “Mayim. If you don’t want to stay here for the night. Fine.” Her dad uttered making her feel a bit relieved. “But I want you to talk to Ryan and fix your problem.” He added. She felt reassured upon hearing her dad, she thought she could just talk to Ryan and then leave as soon as possible.

 

“Talk privately. At the room.” Her dad instructed them. She immediately went up to the room to get things done quickly leaving Ryan and her dad behind downstairs.

 

He looked at Mr. Bialik for a moment seeming to ask for permission to put things the way it has to. “Make her realize her mistake. Make things up and I expect you fix this mess after tonight.” He added and walked away. Ryan immediately followed her to the room and initiated the talk. He was into making her realize that he’s more worthy than Jim but Mayim was into finishing the discussion and leaving as soon as possible. 

 

“How many times do I have to tell you that I don’t want to get back with you. I am with Jim and he makes me happy.” She insisted. “Mayim. Think about it! He’s got nothing. Can he even feed you and your family? He’s just a secretary. I got money. I got power. I can give you everything you need.” He countered. 

 

“He makes me happy me the way you can’t! You never will.” She refuted offending him.

 

“Happy? Can he buy you things? Can he-”

“It’s not always about the money, Ryan!” She squelched. “He loves me sincerely and I love him for that.” She insisted. He got annoyed by finding her words about love annoying. 

 

“Loves you? I love you, Mayim. Do I need to show you?!” He replied with angst and forced a kiss on her which she refused to reciprocate. He slapped him in his face as she broke from the kiss. “How dare you!” She yelled at him. He grunted in anger.

 

“You want me to get you the hard way. Then fuck off.” He uttered and walked out of the room. She remained steady for a moment until she heard the door locked from the outside. Her blood rushed as she checked on the door and found out that it was locked.

 

She slammed the door and called for help but Ryan instructed the people to leave her alone.

 

“Let me go! Open the door! Ryan! Dad! Open the door!” She shouted for help but no one lent a hand. She cried in the room feeling so worried about Jim. She didn’t wanna fail him, she knew he’ll get hurt about her not showing up and it pained her that she doesn’t have her phone to inform him what was happening.

 

Ryan took off her phone from his pocket as her dad handed it to him a while back. He saw Jim’s messages and missed calls.

 

> Jim: Gonna wait for you.  _10:45PM  
> _ Jim: Are you on the way already?  _11:13PM  
> _ Jim: You seem busy. No worries. Text me if you’re on the way. I’ll be waiting.  _11:14PM_
> 
> _(Missed a call from Jim)_
> 
> Jim: The guard said the park will close at 1AM. You want us to meet somewhere else in case?  _11:32PM_
> 
> _(Missed a call from Jim)  
> _ _(Missed a call from Jim)  
> _ _(Missed a call from Jim)_
> 
> Jim: The guard said there’s a 24 hrs café nearby. Let’s meet there instead?  _11:34PM_
> 
> _(Missed a call from Jim)  
> _ _(Missed a call from Jim)  
> _ _(Missed a call from Jim)  
> _ _(Missed a call from Jim)_
> 
> Jim: Nvm. I’ll wait for you here.  _11:46PM  
> _ Jim: Are you on your way? Take care. I love you.  _11:58PM  
> _ Jim: I love youuuuuu  _12:01AM  
> _ Jim: Is it weird I miss you already. So excited to see you.  _12:03AM  
> _ Jim: I got something for you. ❤️  _12:05AM_

He felt annoyed as he read his messages. Suddenly Jim rang her phone again and Ryan pressed decline in annoyance.

–

Jim started to worry why she isn’t answering his calls or replying to his messages. On another side, he felt broken as he realized that she is currently with Ryan and her dad as of the moment and things that he least want to happen could possibly happen at that very moment, yet, he tried to shrug it off and think positively.

 

“Excuse me sir. The park will close in an hour.” The guard informed him. “Alright. I’m just waiting for my girlfriend. She’ll be here any minute.” He replied. The guard nodded and smiled at him respectfully.

 

He continued waiting for her throughout the night and the guard kept on reminding him about the closing time of the park but he kept on asking for consideration.

 

“I’m sorry. I’m really waiting for my girlfriend. She’ll be here any minute. I swear. Just five more minutes? Please?” He pleaded the guard. “Alright, sir. Five more minutes.” The guard gave him a chance as she felt pity for him for waiting for his girl who doesn’t seem to be coming anymore.

 

Jim waited for Mayim until 2AM. “Sorry sir, you can no longer stay here. We’ll close the gates already. You have to go. You can come back at 8.” The guard asked him to leave and he had no choice. He felt broken and his hopes of Mayim coming started to fade as he walked out of the park.  
  


> Jim: I’ll stay at the café, let’s meet there. The park is closed already. I love you.   _2:16AM_

  
He sent her a message but he didn’t receive any replies or callback anymore. He stayed at the café until 5AM and decided to go home as he already lost hope of her coming around.

 


	11. Broken Hopes

Jim went out early to a jewelry store, he took the diamond ring he pre-ordered way back before for Mayim. He has been working so hard to be able to buy her that ring and now that it’s in his hands, he couldn’t wait to give it to her and ask her to marry him.

As he went home, the thought that there’s a possibility that she would reject knowing that she once said before that she isn’t ready yet but he still had hopes. He also prepared himself incase she rejects him, and he would totally understand her if ever.

_I waited for several years for her to be my girlfriend, I could wait longer for her to be my wife until she’s ready._

He thought and smiled as he thought of her. He daydreamed about what could possible happen that evening when he gives her the ring and ask her to marry him, he was excited and nervous at the same time. Thoughts crowded his mind for several hours and little did he know that he was already asleep. 

> **Mayim:**  See you later, love!  _3:35PM_

His phone made a sound and it woke him up. He smiled upon seeing her text and replied an “I love you.” Despite that his other eyes is still closed. He moved his sight to the time and his blood rushed as he realize that it was 5PM already. He immediately showered and prepped himself up to go to Four Seasons hotel where the party is held and wait until the event is over so he could go out with his beloved, girlfriend already.

—

The event began at 6PM and it was set to end around 9PM. The whole bosses, employers and employees of the company was there, the largest stockholders and partnering companies were also invited to the event making it extremely huge.

“Be sure to act accordingly. Don’t make a scene.” Mayim’s father instructed her before the event officially began. “Yes dad.” She replied. Her dad smiled at her as his eyes twinkled as if he wants to tell his daughter how beautiful she was but he was suppressing himself and it was unusual for her to see that from her own father – it meant a lot to her. She smiled back at him before he walked away.

The event went smoothly until the end. Mayim stood at the side of the platform and handed the microphone to Ryan as she finished addressing her speech for the night. Jim proudly watched her deliver her speech from the outside of the venue, peeking on the glass doors. He looked at the ring he got for her as she finished speaking, it made him more excited to give it to her and ask her to marry her. He felt so happy.

“Good evening. First of all I’d like to thank everyone for coming…” Ryan began delivering his speech. “Your speech was impressive. Great job.” Mayim’s father whispered to her making her feel so appreciated and inspired. Her dad rarely recognizes her efforts. 

“Thanks dad.” She replied with fascination in her eyes. From a distance, Jim felt so happy to see his girlfriend exchanging smiles with her dad, he knew it meant a lot to her.

“And before the night ends… I’d like to share a very special moment to me tonight with everyone…” Ryan continued his speech making everyone wonder what was he about to do, everyone was clueless and thrilled.

Ryan looked at Mayim and reached for her hand. Her dad nodded at her instructing her to just go with the flow even if she was completely clueless. She held Ryan’s hand and stood beside him as he addresses his speech.

“As you all know. Mayim and I have been together for quite some time now…” Ryan shared to the audience giving them a hint, she looked at him for some clue. “And I’d like everyone to witness this special moment for us.” He continued and kneeled in front of her. The people started to squeal and gasp as he knelt to the ground. 

“Ryan.” She uttered discreetly. He pulled out a box of ring from his pocket and presented it to her. “Ryan, what are you doing? Stand up.” She whispered as her blood rushed but he just ignored her. 

“Mayim Bialik. Will you marry me?” He popped the question in front of the people flabbergasting Mayim. She looked around clueless of how to respond, it wasn’t part of her planned, she wasn’t informed yet, she can’t diss Ryan in front of their colleagues and stockholders. Everyone’s eyes were twinkling next to them. She looked at her father and he was happily smiling at them. Ryan placed the microphone away from his mouth for a moment. 

“You wouldn’t want to reject me in front of everyone. Just say yes.” He demanded with his smiling face to keep the people from having a hint of her second thought. She just looked at him. “But…” She uttered softly but he initiated and placed the ring on her finger no longer waiting for her response. The people applauded as her stood up after putting the ring on her finger thinking she accepted it. 

“She said yes!” He said over the microphone as his hands cupped her waist pressing her close to him. Everyone went up and congratulated the two. Her eyes explored the venue with the anxiety across her chest of what just happened when suddenly she saw Jim from afar peeking into the venue’s door stunned as he saw everything. His heart were terribly shattered, his plans felt deteriorated, the only thing left was broken hopes and heartaches in his chest.

Her eyes grew a bit, her chest pounded hard upon seeing him, she knew she had to explain. She rushed but Ryan held her hand tightly. “Where are you going?” He asked her but she refused to respond and pulled her hand off him and ran after Jim. She struggled to run after Jim with her five inch stilettos and dress on, she started crying.

“Jim, wait.” She called but he was walking away too fast. 

“Jim! Please let me explain.” She tried until she tripped over making him stop.

She stood up and continued crying as she walked closer to him. She looked at his eyes and saw him shattered and hurt. 

“Jim… Please let me explain…” She pleaded. “Explain what?” He asked weakly. “That you made me go here so I can watch Ryan propose to you and watch you say yes?” He followed up. “No… No… Jim” She replied feeling so bad. 

“I didn’t know he was going to propose-”

“But you said yes.” He squelched making her feel guilty. She didn’t know how to sum it up and make him understand, she was running out of words, she couldn’t help but cry.

“Jim I don’t know how explain it but trust me I didn’t want to hurt you.” She tried but it came differently to him. 

“Mayim. Did you really love me?” He asked fearing that he won’t hear the answer that he hopes for. “Jim-” She uttered.

“Mayim.” Her dad called from behind with Ryan on his side disabling her to continue. “What are you doing here?” He asked even if he was aware of what’s happening. 

“Go back to inside, the guests needs you.” Her dad instructed her. “But dad…” She pleaded and cried. Ryan glared at Jim as Mayim was distracted by her dad provoking him to leave. Their presence made Jim feel more hopeless.

“Jim wait!” She called but he continued walking away. “Jim!” Her dad held her arm prohibiting her to follow him. “Dad please…” She cried. “I need to talk to him.” She wept but she was still barred to go until Jim was completely gone of the place. “No. Stop crying and get back inside. Our guests need you.” Her dad demanded and walked away. She continued weeping and Ryan wiped her tears. “Stop crying now.” He tried to comfort her but she didn’t appreciate it. “Go away!” She pushed him away and went to the comfort room to cry her heart out until she was okay. She had her make up retouched to conceal her crying eyes before she went back to the venue and pretend nothing’s wrong. Some of the people had a hint that something was wrong, some didn’t, nevertheless, the party continued and ended successfully. Soon then, the guests went home one by one until the place turned empty. Mayim kept on sending messages and calling Jim but he wasn’t picking up and few attempts after, he turned off his phone leaving her with no mode of communication with him.

Ryan offered Mayim a ride hoping he could take the chance of her conflict with Jim but she refused and insisted to go home along with her own driver. She rushed home hoping to talk to Jim and explain things to him without the interruption of Ryan and her dad.

As soon as she arrived home, she hurried to the guest room to talk to Jim but the door was closed. She tried to knock a few times but he wasn’t answering. “Jim, please open the door.” She begged.

“Miss Mayim?” Her househelper called her attention. “Sir Jim isn’t in there.” She informed her. “Wha… Where is he?” She baffled. “I’m not sure but when he came here he went straight to his room and left with all his things and bags.” She replied hesitantly making Mayim stupefied.

“What?” She uttered as her voice faded and her eyes tearing up. 

She made a sharp exhale as it sank to her that he left and lost the opportunity to talk and fix things up with him. She knew he was badly hurt yet, she

“Do you know where he went?” Her voice dwindled as she struggled to further hold back her tears. The house helper shook his head. “No, miss Mayim.” She replied. Mayim nodded. “You can go.” She asked the house helper to leave. As soon as she was alone, she went inside Jim’s old room and sat on the bed he used to sleep at and started to break down until she fell asleep in deep sorrow.

—

Next day, Mayim decided to stay home instead of going to work hoping Jim would appreciate her effort to give him space and would miss her absence at the workplace, in addition, her head was in extreme pain after crying so much.

—

Mayim went to the office already hoping to see and talk to Jim already but when she arrived, he wasn’t at his desk yet so she waited for a while. Kaley entered her office and handed her some documents for their incoming presentation. “Thanks!” 

“Uhm, Kaley.” She called before she was able to go. “Yeah?” She replied. Mayim sighed and gulped. “Do you know where Jim is? I arrived at eight and it’s already nine thirty but I haven’t seen him yet.” She asked. Kaley felt so clueless by her question. “Uhm… Didn’t you know?” She asked back. “Know what?” Mayim replied. “Jim resigned already. Two days ago I guess.” Kaley informed blowing Mayim away. “What?” She replied. 

“I thought you knew. What happened?” She asked but Mayim turned teary giving her a hint for the answer she was expecting. “Do you know where he is staying right now? He left the house and I really need to talk to him. I have to see him, Kaley.” She confided. Kaley couldn’t do anything but hug her to comfort her. “I’m sorry… I don’t know. I thought he changed number too because I was trying to call him yesterday to ask why he resigned but he cannot be reached.” She shared. Mayim hugged her back and broke down on her shoulder. 

“Don’t worry, when I see him or know where he stays, I’ll tell you right away, kay? Stop crying now.”

Mayim was so clueless on where to find Jim. He moved out, he resigned and changed his number and it was her only way to contact him. She felt so hopeless. Days passed by, her dad hired another secretary for her already, everyday she hoped that she would know where he was so he could talk to him already but as more days passed, her hopes started to deteriorate leaving her with no choice but to accept that she already lost him and she should just continue with her life as she is now, technically, Ryan’s fiancé.

It is only that she realized that she wanted to be Jim forever, it’s just now that she no longer felt pressured thinking about marrying him someday. But it was too late. He’s already gone.


	12. Hello from the Outside

~

Jim was able to save up a bit for the past months. He used up his money to be able to travel to Sacramento and find a cheap and good place to stay as he looks for a new job around. He rented Village Oaks’s cheap apartment unit at Marconi Avenue in Sacramento and eventually got hired at Bank of America starting as a bank teller. He also took a part time job at Rubio’s Mexican restaurant so he could have further source of income especially during the weekends when he’s not working at the bank. He was able to sustain and remain stable with his current career yet, it was inevitable for him not to miss Mayim as he felt so far away from her. 

 

Every single day since he left, he would always sit alone in his apartment and gaze upon the ring that he dreamt of giving to her and recall those perfect times they had — best times of his life, indeed. He could clearly recall how he could picture out her in a wedding gown, walking down the aisle as he was waiting for her on the other side on a tux, as he was gazing upon her beauty and thanking God for her existence. He couldn’t help but smile when he imagines the two of them living together with a little boy and a little girl calling them mommy and daddy. Him sleeping next to her and watching her until she falls asleep. 

 

There were times when he will read the newspaper and see a section about the Bialik corporation and it was inevitable for him not to read the updates about Mayim and Ryan’s incoming wedding and it breaks him every single time.

 

He had so much hopes and dreams with Mayim, yet, it all flew away when he watched her stood next to a man, whom he thinks is better than him, and accept his proposal in front of several people. His plans were shattered as he think about how the person that he loved the most is marrying someone else when it was all that he dreamed about.

 

_I knew she was only just a dream. A dream I could never have. Ever._

He thought and felt so down as he convinced himself to get over something that would never happen. He had to let go, he has to move on no matter how hard it was for him.

 

—

 

Mayim never felt so much pain for someone until she fell in love with Jim and lost him — it slightly ruined her. However, even if her heart was still into Jim even if it has been months since he left, she just let things happen. She no longer objected in being engaged to Ryan. For her, her life lost its essence and meaning, whether she marries Ryan or another man, she would never be happy again because Jim was her only happiness.

 

Time flew, Mayim somehow managed to move on from Jim and focus on her career. She recently just became the president of their company with the blessing of her father who retired due to aging. Mayim felt so happy as her dad trusted her with the highest position for their company and told her how proud he actually was of her. He has been being hard on her because he wanted her to grow up tough and strong enough to take any hard and down time of life. It served as her motivation to continue life and be okay even if she’s breaking.

 

—

 

A month before Mayim and Ryan’s wedding day was the month they were completely busy in setting up and planning for their wedding — the wedding venue, the reception venue, the theme, the catering meals and of course, her wedding gown.

 

They had the Le Foyer Ballroom of L.A Banquets for their reception venue. Her wedding gown was Vera Wang. Everything was going smooth and it was all set.

 

—

 

The night before Mayim’s wedding day, she locked herself in her room and laid down on her bed thinking about things. The maids would just bring foods in for she didn’t wanna go out. She started receiving messages from her friends and colleagues expressing their happiness for her as she is about to get married the next day, yet, she felt alone as she realized how everyone thinks that she is happy even when she isn’t. She’ll never be okay because no matter how many days have passed, weeks and months, she still couldn’t get herself together and move on from Jim and now that she’s getting married, she couldn’t find any happiness inside her unless the man he was marrying was Jim. 

 

That moment was very emotional for her. All she could think about is how much she is sorry for hurting him. All she could feel is regret and sadness for seeming to lose someone who loved her sincerely, letting him go without being able to explain things and made him feel cheated on when it was the least thing he deserved.

 

Tears started to drip from her eyes streaming down to her cheeks as she started reminiscing her memories with Jim again. It broke her to think that after her wedding with Ryan, everything will be over and she has to live life of being Ryan’s wife, a life where it was no longer allowed to acknowledge that she fell in love with a perfect person named, Jim.

 

—

 

People knocked on her door. Mayim opened her eyes, light blinded her sight causing her pupils to minimize. Her eyes was a bit swollen from crying. It was quarter to six as she checked on the clock. She stood up and opened the door.

 

“It’s your special day!” Her closest relatives arrived and woke her up. She faked a smile at them. “Yeah. I’ll take a bath and get ready.” She replied. “Alright! The make up artist and hairstylist is already outside. Happy bathing!” They squealed before she closed the door. She pressed her back against the door and made a deep sigh. She closed her eyes. 

 

_This is the day. This is it._

 

She stripped herself down and played some sad songs as she took a sentimental warm bath while thinking about her memories with Jim and it was inevitable for her to tear up and cry.

 

As soon as she finished taking a bath, she wiped herself dry and wrapped the towel around her body as she looked down on her wedding gown lying flatly at the top of her bed. She wore her clothing and gown on. She paced to the mirror and gazed at herself wearing her wedding gown.

_It’s beautiful. I wish he could see it._

She thought as she recalled how Jim would always tell her how he imagines her in a wedding gown on their wedding. What was happening was exactly what he planned, the only difference is, he isn’t her groom and it just eliminates that moment’s essence. She sighed and looked down as she held back her tears.

 

Her relatives unlocked her door and allowed the stylists to enter to get the fixing started. 

 

“Oh look at you.” They said.

“You’re hair is still down and you’ve got no make up on yet but you already look like a queen!” The stylists complimented her. “Thank you.” She smiled softly. She sat down in front of her dresser and permitted them to fix her looks already.

 

“Gorgeous! I’ll leave you with them for now okay? We’ll be outside.” Her aunt informed her and she nodded. 

 

Her hair stylist and make up artist continued fixing her looks and found it inevitable not to ask what’s wrong for it was so obvious that she isn’t very hyped.

 

“What’s wrong honey?” Her gay stylist asked her surprising her a bit with a question like that. “You’ve been frowning since we started. You’re getting married, shouldn’t you be happy?” He asked. She looked at him from the mirror clueless of either to confide or just pretend she’s fine.

 

He paused for a moment and looked at her sad eyes through her reflection. “You’re very beautiful honey. Keep that frown from your face. It’s your special day. He had a strong feeling as she looked away and sighed. He twisted her chair and made her face him. “You aren’t in love with your groom are you?” He asked courageously even if he was unsure. It took her sometime before she was able to reply. “No…” She uttered softly.

 

“Then why are you going to marry him?” He asked.

 

“Because the man that I wanted to marry is gone.” She replied and held back her tears fearing of smearing her make up. “Oh… Is he… gone like… gone in heaven?” He asked.

 

She chuckled a bit. “No.” Her smile faded quickly. “I hurt his feelings and he left.” She elaborated. “Oh…” He uttered. 

 

“Well you know honey… Not that I am being a complete sucker right now but if you don’t wanna get married, you don’t have to. Marriage is forever.” He expressed his view on her situation but then she thought it’s better to just get married and go since nothing could make her feel any better. 

 

“Well-” Her phone rang a message before she was able to respond to him. 

 

 **Kaley:** Mayim!!!!!!!! I know where Jim lives!!!!!  
**Kaley:** Reply ASAP!!!!!

 **Kaley:** Village Oaks’s apartment unit 05 at Marconi Avenue in Sacramento!!!!

 

Mayim’s blood rushed, her eyes grew as she read Kaley’s consecutive messages. Few seconds after, Kaley rang her phone up.

 

 **Kaley:** Hey! Mayim! Mayim! Can you hear me?

 **Mayim:** Yes! Yes-

 **Kaley:** Jim lives at Village Oak’s unit 05 in Sacramento!!! I am sure about this! I’m so sorry to tell this to you at this time, you’re about to get married but I thought you should know!

 **Kaley:** Hello? Mayim?

 

Mayim seemed to hang up. “I have to go.” She told her stylist. “What? Wait where-” He panicked. “To the person I love.” She replied. “You can cover up for me right? Tell them you didn’t see me after you went out of the bathroom, I don’t know. Thank you! Goodbye!” She talked hastily. She quickly used the back door to sneak out without letting anyone know and swiftly drove away for about five hours to Sacramento. 

 

She turned off her phone to keep the people from finding and calling her. This time she was sure about her feelings, she wanted to see Jim and she doesn’t want to marry Ryan. She’ll go after Jim for now and forget about whatever it is that could possibly wait for her in the future, whether it’s acceptance or Ryan’s squad raging against her or Jim rejecting or accepting her again.

 

After a couple of hours, she finally arrived at Village Oaks, even if she was still on her wedding dress, she didn’t care. All she thought about is that she wanted to see Jim. 

 

She knocked on the door with a ukulele hanging on it and a woman opened it for her surprising her a bit.

 

“Uhm… Hello?” The woman asked not expecting a woman in wedding gown to knock on her door. Mayim felt paranoid thinking she was with Jim and he has moved on already. “Who are you?” She asked. 

 

“Who are you? And what are you doing here? In a wedding gown…” The woman returned her question.

 

“I’m here for Jim.” Mayim replied with a pleading eyes. “Jim? Jim Parsons?” The woman asked. “Yes. Yes!” She replied nervously as  she still think that she’s Jim’s new girl. “Oh. He’s not here.” The woman informed her. 

 

“What? Where is he?” Mayim asked quickly. “He’s at unit 05.” The woman moved the ukulele and showed her apartment number. It’s 04, she knocked at the wrong door.

 

“Oh my god.” She counted the doors and she was really on the fourth. She was a bit out of her mind. “I’m sorry.” She apologized. “It’s fine.” The woman chuckled. “You must be Mayim.” She shared. Mayim looked at her with an eye of wondering how she knew about her name. 

 

Jim has been close to her neighbors and since he moved into Village Oaks, they knew about Mayim already. He would always talk about her and call her his dream girl that he never had. They were also aware about her background and family as they were frequently on the business section of the newspapers.

 

“Go after him. He’s next door.” She cheered for her. Mayim smiled in relief, she looked at the ukulele hanging and took it as she came up with an idea. 

 

“Can I borrow this, please?” She asked hastily and the woman nodded.

 

She knocked on unit 05 and as expected, Jim heard the knocking, he wasn’t expecting to receive a hello from the outside. He opened the door with his face filled with huge astonishment upon seeing who was next to it. Mayim couldn’t help but get a bit teary as she saw him again after several months.

 

“Mayim?” He uttered weakly in mixture of surprise and happiness.

 

As she heard him utter her name, she immediately held the ukulele and started playing it along as she sang Adele’s song called “Hello” in her head voice for him — her voice was choppy and cracking as she meant every lyrics she sang.

 

> _Hello, it’s_ me  
>  _I was wondering  
>  __If after all these years  
>  __You’d like to meet…_

“Okay, I’m messing this up. Let me just sing the chorus…” She gulped and recalled the lyrics. “Uhm…” She uttered and started singing again.

> _Hello from_ the other side  
>  _I must've_ called a… ***gulps*** thousand times to tell you  
>  _I'm sorry,_ for everything that I've done  
>  _But when I call you never seem to be home  
>  __Hello from the outside  
>  __At least I can say that I've tried to tell you_

 

“Am sorry… Jim.” She spoke the lyrics.

 

> _For breaking your heart…_

 

She paused and looked at him for a few seconds before continuing to the last line of the song.

 

> _But it don't matter, it clearly… doesn't tear you apart… anymore._

 

Silence swarmed the place as she stopped singing. His eyes were sparkling in tears struggling not to fall down from his eyes. The other people from their apartments watched the two as such moment occurred.

 

“I’m sorry… I ruined the song. Adele is great but… I’m sorry. I should stop.” She tried to apologize in a joking manner while crying in front of him. Smile slowly grew on his lips, he immediately wrapped her around his arms tightly which she gladly reciprocated as she cried harder in happiness.

 

“I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I love you.” She uncontrollably bawled no his shoulders. He initiated to break the hug and held her face with his thumb wiping away her tears. “Hey. Hey.” He called her attention. “Stop crying already. Sssh. I’m not mad at you.” He smiled at her as she held his hands on her face. “Really? You still love me? Please tell me you still do.” She sniffled. He paused for a moment and gazed at her.

 

“Of course.” He replied largely relieving her. She felt so intoxicated by relief and happiness upon hearing his response urging her to exhale sharply.

 

“Jim… I know I’ve hurt you so many times I can’t barely count but I swear to death that you’re the only person that made me feel what true love is.” She confessed making him feel so touched. “So… James Joseph Parsons…” She kneeled her knee in front of him. “Will you, please, marry me?” She cracked the question surprising the people watching them. “Mayim!” Jim chuckled and pulled her up. “What?” She asked softly. 

 

He asked her to wait for a few seconds as he swiftly ran into his room and took something from his drawer.

 

“What did you do?” She asked as soon as he returned. “I… uhm… wanted to do… or ask this to you ever since. Actually, that evening when I left… but I never had the chance to.” He began as she listened carefully. “And… I think now is the right time to ask you about it…” He continued. “Ask me what?” She asked. 

 

He knelt to the ground and pulled out a ring surprising her. “Mayim, please marry me and be my wife? The mother of my kids and be there with me for the rest of our lives?” He popped the question making their neighbors watching squeal in hype.

 

“Ji-, Oh my g-, there’s nobody else I wanna marry than you so YES!” She exclaimed and removed the ring that Ryan had on her. Smile grew on his face as he took the ring he got for her and placed it on her finger. They both got a bit teary but Mayim went to crying hardly in happiness as they wrapped each other on their arms.

 

_I couldn’t believe she said yes. I was expecting it but can you believe it? I’m going to be the husband of the woman that I’ve always dreamed about. I couldn’t imagine myself loving anyone else than her. No matter how many times she got me broken and hurt, I still couldn’t convince myself to stop loving her. She was a dream, she was my dream girl and now I am happy_ _to say that my dream came true. It’s no longer a dream._

—

 

Jim opened his eyes and saw Mayim peacefully sleeping next to him. He paused for a moment and wondered what just happened. He watched her sleep and unintentionally woke her up from her shallow sleep. 

 

“Hmmm?” She uttered. “Is this real?” He asked. “What’s wrong?” She wondered. “Why are you sleeping next to me?” He sounded so confused. 

 

“We’ve been married for ten years. What do you mean why am I sleeping beside you?” She chuckled as she had a hint that he woke up from a dream. “You must be dreaming.” She continued chuckling.

 

“I had a dream... Yeah.” He agreed. “What about?” She asked. “About you. About us.” He replied as he looked blankly from a distance as he recalled it.

 

“And even in my dream, you were still the girl that I’ve been dreaming of.” He confessed. She was gazing at him smiling as he looked at her. “I love you.” He uttered.

 

“And I love you.” She replied and held his hand.

 

Everything was a dream but it felt so real to him because no matter how many worlds he live in, he knows that Mayim will only be the girl he would want to love all over again, quirks and all.

 

**-END-**

  


> _**A/N:** This is Jim and Mayim’s married life, ten years after their love story on the fan fic called [ **“Say You Love Me”**](http://archiveofourown.org/collections/MajimSeries/works/4913941)_


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